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6 годин роздумів: Чому невістка була настільки ворожою до нас?

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Шість років я запитувала себе: Чому невістка була такою ворожою до нас?

Я не розмовляла зі своїм сином Тарасом вже шість років. Мене навіть не запросили на його весілля. Я знала, що в цьому винна невістка Софія. Не розуміла чому, але через неї я дуже страждала.

З чоловіком у нас троє синів, а у нього є ще син від першого шлюбу. Звісно, я люблю всіх своїх дітей, але Тарас, найстарший, був так бажаним, що залишився моєю гордістю.

Шість років тому Тарас зустрів свою майбутню дружину. Вже з самого початку все пішло не так. Перше моє враження від неї було досить позитивним. Перше її відвідування нашого дому минуло без проблем. Все почало псуватися з другого разу. Ми сиділи за столом, коли вона раптом сказала до Тараса: “Ти погано одягаєшся. Я куплю тобі гарні речі”. Він відповів: “Не треба мені нічого дарувати, у кожного свій смак”. Я стала на його сторону. Софія насупилася, але нічого не сказала.

Наступного дня Тарас поцілував мене на прощання, а Софія навіть не підійшла до мене. У той момент я не усвідомлювала, що саме сталося. Лише пізніше зрозуміла, що одним зауваженням накликала на себе гнів невістки.

Навіть на весілля їх я не була запрошена.

Після кількох місяців незвичного мовчання, Тарас запросив нас у гості на свій день народження у Львів — вона була звідти. Ми з чоловіком вирішили зупинитися в готелі та дати молодим можливість повеселитися, але Тарас наполіг, щоб ми переночували в домі Софії, попередивши, що навряд чи її побачимо, оскільки в неї справи в магазині.

На обід всі мали зібратися в ресторані, але вона не прийшла. Кілька днів по тому Тарас сказав мені: “Мамо, я одружуся з Софією”. Додав, що не хоче великого весілля, а маленьке свято. Це мене не турбувало, я сказала, що рада за нього.

Через тиждень він зателефонував і сказав, що Софія не хоче, щоб я була присутня на весіллі. Був запрошений лише мій чоловік. Брати також не були допущені. У мене немає слів описати те, що я відчула в той момент. Я передала слухавку чоловікові, який сказав Тарасу, що не піде на жодне весілля без мене та дітей. Тарас розізлився і поклав трубку.

Протягом наступних днів невістка намагалася зв’язатися зі мною, але кожного разу потрапляла на мого чоловіка. Нарешті вона таки мене дістала і з дуже неприємним тоном крикнула: “Нарешті!” Я накопичила стільки гніву, що не витримала і сказала їй: “Знаєш, не хочу більше про тебе чути!” Це була наша остання розмова.

Невдовзі вони вирушили до Бельгії. Протягом двох років ми не мали жодних новин від них. Моя сестра написала їм, а Софія відповіла їй: “Тарас вже має нову родину”. Насправді мій син залишив контакт лише з братом Василем, якого бачив час від часу, але більше до нас не з’являвся. І так шість років.

Я спробувала зв’язатися з Тарасом кілька місяців тому, тому що мені його дуже не вистачало. Написала два вибачальні листи — один Тарасу, другий Софії. Не отримала жодної відповіді.

Коли моя мама померла три роки тому, Тарас не з’явився на похорон. Не прийшов і коли я втратила старшу сестру. За останні шість років ми отримали від нього лише одне смс на день народження мого чоловіка. І з тих пір — тиша.

У мене таке відчуття, що частина мене померла. Випадково дізналася, що вони переїхали в інше місто, але навіть не знаю яке. Щодня я думаю про Тараса. Найгірше, що я навіть не розумію, чому все зайшло так далеко. Довго вважала, що Софія ним маніпулює, що вона хоче його тільки для себе. Запитувала себе: чому вона так вороже налаштована до нас? Не знаю, бо вона ніколи не хотіла мені сказати. Можливо, я сама від початку підходила неправильно. Як би мені хотілося, щоб все пішло інакше!

Два місяці тому ми з чоловіком вирушили в коротку подорож до Бельгії — виграли її в одній лотереї. І коли ми прогулювалися однією з вуличок чергового містечка з маршруту, зупинилися на дитячому майданчику. Ми дивилися і мріяли про онуків… Маленький хлопчик підійшов до нас, переслідуючи свій м’яч. Він так нагадував мені сина в дитинстві! Усміхнулася, чоловік підкинув м’ячик дитині, а вона віддала — стали грати… Через хвилину хтось покликав дитину: “Емилю!”…

Я не могла повірити в цю випадковість — наш шлях перетинались син і Софія! Після того, як ми кинулися в обійми, пішов потік слів, в яких ми всі ніби загубилися. І вони, і ми так закрилися в собі, що припинили намагатися спілкуватися… Так, визнаю, якби хтось мені сказав “не хочу більше про тебе чути”, я навряд чи спробувала б. Але я усвідомила це лише після тривалої розлуки з сином і його родиною. Вони також пройшли через важкий етап. Але з питанням “де дідусь і бабуся”, наш онук змусив їх переглянути своє ставлення. Очевидно, всі ми подорослішали і хотіли забути минуле.

Ми залишили екскурсійну групу і залишилися в маленькому бельгійському містечку, де ніби почали все спочатку — змінені, шукаючи розуміння.

Зараз ми надолужуємо втрачені роки і радіємо взаємній любові та повазі.

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