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Після зустрічі з батьком мій син сказав, що більше мене не любить

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Після зустрічі з батьком мій син оголосив, що більше не кохає мене

Коли два роки тому ми з чоловіком розлучилися, мені здавалося, що ми розійшлися по-людськи. Без скандалів, без криків. Ми просто перестали бути щасливими разом. Я не забороняла йому бачити сина, навпаки — завжди підкреслювала, що дитині потрібен тато. Хотів навідуватись — будь ласка. Хотів забирати до себе — на здоров’я, я лише за, аби синові було добре.

Нашому Данилкові зараз сім. Нещодавно закінчилися осінні канікули, і колишній чоловік наполіг, щоб син провів їх у нього. Я не заперечувала. Навіть зраділа, подумала: нехай побачаться, проведуть час разом — це ж так важливо.

Але вже через кілька дній я почала помічати дивні речі. Я дзвонила Данилкові, але він не підходив до телефону. Замість нього трубку брали то колишній чоловік, то його мати, моя колишня свекруха, і щоразу мені відповідали одне й те саме: «Данилко на прогулянці», «він грається», «не може підійти».

Мене це насторожило. Адже я — його мати. Я маю право почути свого сина, дізнатися, як у нього справи. Чому вони приховують від мене його голос, його настрій? Що там коїться?

Коли канікули завершилися, колишній привіз сина додому. Я відчинила двері й одразу відчула — щось не так. Він був інший. Незнайомо мовчазний, погляд порожній, губи щільно стиснуті. І це не втома. Це — образа.

Я присіла поруч, поклала руку йому на плече.

— Данилку, серденько, як ти? Усе гаразд? Я сумувала… — хотіла пригорнути його.

Але він різко відсторонився й, не підіймаючи очей, промовив:

— Я тебе більше не люблю.

Ви коли-небудь чули, як відривається шматок серця? У ту мить я почула. Я відчула це. Він сказав це спокійно, але в цих чотирьох словах було стільки холодності, ніби говорив зовсім чужий чоловік.

У мене перехопило подих. Я не знала, що відповісти. Лише через кілька годин, уже вночі, я нарешті наважилася обережно заговорити. І тоді він розкрився.

Сказав, що у тата з бабусею чув багато поганого про мене. Що я, мовляв, зла, не даю жити, заважаю їм бути разом, спеціально роблю їм боляче, що це «я винна, що тато страждає». Вони буквально вмивали дитині мізки.

Я слухала це — і в мене тремтіли руки. Як можна так чинити з семирічною дитиною? З власним сином? З онуком? Що я їм зробила? Адже я ніколи не наговорила проти них, ніколи не говорила Данилкові поганого про батька. Я берегла його від нашої дорослої болі.

А вони? Вони вкрали у нього віру в матір.

З того часу я більше не дозволяю синові їздити до батька. Так, я розумію, це звучить різко, але я маю захистити свою дитину. Я не дозволю більше нікому травмувати його душу.

Я — його мати. І я не віддам сина тим, хто так легковажно сіє в ньому ненависть. Нехай спочатку навчаться бути людьми. Тоді, можливо, я подумаю, чи давати їм другий шанс.

Життя вчить нас важливому: іноді доводиться оберігати своїх близьких навіть від тих, хто повинен їх любити.

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