З життя
Why Did I Agree to Let My Son and Daughter-in-Law Move in With Me? I Still Don’t Have the Answers.
Why did I ever agree to let my son and daughter-in-law move in with me? Honestly, I still dont know.
Im Vera Simmons, living in a modest two-bedroom flat in one of Bristols quieter neighbourhoods. At sixty-three, Im a widow with a pension just large enough to scrape by. When my son, Oliver, married two years ago, I was over the moonas any mother would be. Hes young, just thirty-one, and his wife, Poppy, is a smidge younger. They tied the knot in a lovely ceremony, but there was one tiny problem: they had nowhere to live. No house, no flat, just big dreams and empty pockets. Mum, they said, well stay with you just for a bit. Soon as we save up for a deposit, well be out of your hair.
Like a proper fool, I was thrilledvisions of babysitting grandchildren danced in my head. So, I said yes. Fast-forward two years, and here we are, all crammed together like tinned sardines, with my sanity hanging by a thread.
At first, I kept my nose out of their business. Newlyweds need space, after all. I cooked, did their laundry, played the role of doting mum and mother-in-law. Then Poppy got pregnant. Quite soon, I thoughtbut who am I to question fate? Along came my grandson, Arthur, an absolute cherub. Only problem? The savings vanished faster than biscuits at a tea party. Nappies, formula, organic baby mushtop-tier brands only, mind youbecause apparently, nothing less would do for little Arthur.
Dont get me wrong, Im happy to help. But I didnt sign up to be a live-in nanny, chef, and cleaning service rolled into one. The new mum is exhaustedtoo tired to rise before noon, glued to her phone while Arthur entertains himself in his playpen. There I am, scrubbing floors, cooking lunch, bathing the baby, while Poppy lounges on the sofa, sighing about how drained she is.
And Oliver? Off to work he goes, trudging home silent as a ghost. If I so much as hint at a conversation, he shuts me down with a sharp, Mum, dont interfere. Meanwhile, Poppy acts like she owns the place. One word from me, and shes got three backusually at a volume the neighbours could probably sing along to. Then Oliver accuses me of bullying his wife. Bullying! Me, the woman footing half their bills!
Enough was enough. Oliver, I said, find yourselves a rental. Im knackered. His reply? No money, Mum. I even offered to swapId take a tiny studio if it meant theyd finally grow up, save for a proper home, and live like actual adults. Id pop in for the occasional nanny shift, but that was it. Did they jump at the chance? Of course not. Nods, shrugs, zero action.
I get itlifes tough when youre young. But Im not made of steel. My joints ache, my blood pressures through the roof, and I havent slept properly in months. Yet if they need mehospital runs, babysitting, you name itIm there in a flash. The second I dare mention my own exhaustion, though, I get looks like Ive betrayed the Crown.
The final straw? Last week, after cleaning the kitchen and whipping up breakfast for Arthur, Poppy emerged from her lie-in and snapped, Ugh, not homemade again! I told you, we want the jarred stuff! That did it. I told her I was a grandmother, not a short-order cook, and perhaps it was time they started adulting. Cue the waterworks, Oliver storming to her defence, doors slammingonly for them to swan back an hour later, acting like nothing happened. Not so much as a mumbled Sorry.
Now I wake up every morning asking myself: Why did I let this happen? Why didnt I put my foot down sooner? Maybe because Im a mother. Because I love my son. But these days, as I sit clutching my blood pressure pills, I wonderwould kicking them out be so cruel? Itd break my heart, yes, but at least I might keep my sanity.
Tell meam I the only gullible old fool out there? Or are there others my age, trapped in this very same circus?
