My Husband Left Me for Maddy, Then Asked for a Second Chance – I Said No

Andrew went over to Mollys flat and then begged for a second chanceI turned him down.

Fine, Im to blame, he said, but simply

Simply what, Andrew? I prompted him.

Sometimes a person cant control his feelings! he blurted. Its like breathing. You cant just decide to stop breathing, can you?

Exactly, I replied, surprised at the chill in my own voice. I cant either

***

It all began three weeks ago. Andrew suddenly started buying new shirtsexpensive, impractical, not even stainproof. He signed up at a gym, even though for the past five years his most vigorous exercise had been a trek from the sofa to the kitchen. Strangest of all, his jealousy vanished.

Before, if I stayed an extra half hour at the office, his calls would start: Where are you? Who with? When will you be back? Now there was zero reaction.

Even the night I got home at midnight after a corporate dinner, he mumbled something incoherent and turned his back to the wall. At first I was pleasedfinally hed grown up, stopped acting like a jealous schoolboy. I even bragged to a friend:

Can you believe it? Hes actually changed! At fortythree hes suddenly caring about his health and hes stopped being possessive. He trusts me, so it must be good!

She gave me a strange look and said nothing. In hindsight, a conversation with her might have made me see the whole picture sooner.

But I was an optimist. I thought he was having a midlife crisis, trying to feel young again. I smiled when he did planks and pushups each morning.

Then I found a receipt in the pocket of his jacket. A café receipt for two cappuccinos and two cheesecakes, dated Tuesday, three oclock.

Tuesday, I recalled. Thats the day he told me hed be in meetings all day, not even having time for lunch

My heart tightened, but I brushed it off. Maybe he was having coffee with a colleague or entertaining a business partner. It happens.

Later, more receipts appeared, plus a business card from a boutique hairdressernot the one hed been going to for fifteen years, but a trendy salon in the city centre. And a whiff of perfume lingered. Good heavens, why do men think their wives wont notice another man’s scent after years of marriage?

***

Its a new client, he explained later. A woman, very sharp. Shes built a perfume boutique from scratch. She gave me some samples.

I believed him, because I wanted to. Eighteen years of marriage isnt a joke; its a whole life. Our daughter was grown, studying at university in another city. Wed bought a flat, built a cottage in the countryside.

His mother, before passing on, had held my hands, thanked me for loving her son, and said shed made him happy.

Happy

***

Then the call came on a Saturday morning. Andrew was in the shower; his phone lay on the nightstand. The caller ID read Molly H.

Molly his first love. A story from the days when he still believed in forever. It had been twenty years since she chose someone else and disappeared from his radar. I, naïve as ever, thought that chapter was closed.

I didnt answer. I just watched the screen flicker. Seven rings, then a text: Ill be waiting there.

Everything fell into place: the new shirts, the gym, the perfume, the café at three.

Shes back, isnt she? I asked, surprised by my own calm. Molly, shes returned?

Andrew winced.

His face looked bewildered, as if Id caught him redhanded. Though there was nothing to hide; the truth was already out.

Listen, Ivy If you think he stammered.

Think what? I teased. What am I supposed to think? That my husband gets a call from his ex? That hes buying new shirts and hitting the gym? That hes sipping coffee at a café while supposedly in meetings?

We just ran into each other by chance Shes divorced, moved back here. We just talked

Andrew, I cut in, stop. Were adults. Tell me straightdo you still love her?

He fell silent. Seconds stretched, and in that silence I heard everything I needed.

I tried, he finally exhaled. I swear, Ivy, I tried. I thought it would pass. I thought Id fall back in love with you. Youre sensible, good. And her

And shes your first love, I finished for him. Your original. And Im just a backup runway, a consolation prize Got it.

He didnt answer.

So, I said, lets get a divorce, shall we?

Andrew flinched again.

Hold on, Ivy, dont be so quick Maybe we could try

Try what? I snapped. Pretend nothing happened? Pretend you dont run off to see her? Pretend you dont think of her while you lie next to me? No, thanks. Go to her.

He gave me a long, strange look, as if he truly didnt recognise me. Id always been the accommodating, easygoing wifenever fighting, never making a scene.

Goldstandard wife, his mother used to call me.

Right, as if shed ever wanted gold. He wanted the first love that drove him mad, that made him lose his head.

***

Thank you, he suddenly said. Thank you for understanding.

***

We signed the divorce papers quickly, without drama. We left the flat to our daughter, who was about to get married. I moved back in with my mother in our old twobedroom house. Andrew moved in with his Molly.

Three months later I was finally pulling myself together. I landed a new job, picked up a hobby, started going to the theatre and galleries with a friend.

Then Andrew called.

Ivy, hi his voice sounded lost. Listen, can I come over? I need to talk.

I agreed, and about twenty minutes later he was at the door with a bunch of white chrysanthemums.

I messed up, he said, handing them over. Totally messed up. Forgive me. Ive realized she isnt who I thought she was. Or maybe Im not who I thought I was In short, were strangers now. And you

What about me? I smirked.

Well, I just realised I miss you, he replied. I miss your calm, your care, the way you laugh at my stupid jokes, the coffee you brew in the mornings

Andrew, I interrupted. Are you having a fit?

Ivy! he pleaded. Give me another chance! I get it nowyou’re my real happiness, not a ghost from the past.

I looked at him and thought how easy it would be to say yes, to let him back in, to pretend nothing had happened, to return to the life I once knew.

To forgive and move on

But I didnt want to be a consolation prize any longer. I didnt want to be the person people return to when theyve nowhere else to go. I didnt want to lie awake wondering if some other phantom from my past would call, reminding me of the twentyyearold version of him.

No, Andrew, I said softly. Im sorry, but no. You made your choice back then.