З життя
And Why I Swapped My Financially-Savvy Wife for a Different Partner
Did the dishes again. Its the third daysink stacked high as a cathedral of cups and plates. Not a clean mug left in the house. Waited, watched the tap drip, waited some more What am I meant to do? I trudge home from work: famished, cross, worn out. And theres nothing but a wall of dirty crockery, so I have to scrub everything before I even think of eating.
Except, theres hardly anything in the cupboard, either. I flick the kettle on and stick a saucepan with water on the hob. Maybe Ill boil a few sausages, or just let them float. The hunger wriggles in my bones. Funny, I never once pictured myself suffering like this And what a broth my Margaret made! If only there were a bowl of her soup now
Her pies, too. Flaky crusts, packed with all sorts inside. And those ribsher pride and joy. Always so tidyevery bit of the house gleaming. The scent of spring breeze wrapped around every room. Returning from work felt like stepping into a fresh world. Now
How did I not notice? It seemed Margaret needed nothing more than laundry and recipes
One afternoon, I spotted Emily. Striking, short skirt and stilettos. She was stepping out of a hairdressers, the queen of shine and polish. Everything about her seemed well, brighter.
I never bothered with salons. Never splashed out on hair or worried about dying it wild colours. Rarely prowled the high street boutiques. Margaret was just as slim and graceful. Simply never fancied the gloss and glitter. Jeans, trainersready to dash to the corner shop, ready to dash round the house.
I love someone else! I told Margaret when I got home. And Im leaving. I wont pretend.
Margaret kept whisking the cream for her Victoria sponge. Didnt even turn. I missed the silent teardrops slipping down her cheeks…
I was tired of seeing, beside me, not a lover, but a housekeeper. Maybe thats why I lost myself in Emily for a while. Now, I do the dishes, scrub the floors, and try my hand at dusting. Still havent mastered cooking, and at night, sometimes I dream of Margarets perfect pies…
Emily has brand new nailscant possibly handle the washing up. She lounges on the settee, leafing through Vogue, ready for another hair appointment. Dresses scattered across the carpet, shoes lying where they droppedIve tripped over them twice already. She hasnt decided what to wear to the salon. The glass yesterdaynever washed, still here.
Why did I swap my wife for such a languid girl? Its hardly worth it. Shall I fix some pasta? Im famishedI boil the pasta. The water bubbles up and spills over, hissing like something alive. I stand over the sink, hand trembling as I drain it, my reflection warped in the metal. The kitchen smells of rubber soles and perfume, not home. Not Margaret.
I eat from a chipped plate, fork scraping, alone with my hunger and regret. Emily calls out, asking if theres any sparkling water. I remember how Margaret used to make everything sparkle, even me.
I glance at the clock; late. Too late for apologies, too late for pies. Yet, as I wipe crumbs from the table, a memory risesMargarets flour-dusted hands cupping my face, her voice soft and steady: We build things, even when theyre messy.
For a moment, I clutch that memory like a lifeline. I swallow hard, tasting the bitterness of what I gave up. The sink is empty again; I have cleaned it myself. I realize, finally, its not the dishes or the piesnot even the gleaming floors. Its the feeling that someone waits for you, quietly, patiently, turning a house into a world.
I slip out quietly, leaving Emily with her magazines and laundry. Step into the night, cold and uncertain, but suddenly, impossibly hopeful. Maybe there is still a spring breeze somewhere, still warmth to be found, still work to doif only I am willing.
If only I remember how to ask, and how to begin.
