Now I Finally Understand Why My Husband Only Introduced Me to His Mother-in-Law on Our Wedding Day

So many young daughters-in-law endure difficult relationships with their mothers-in-law, unable to confide in anyone.

Our first wedding anniversary is fast approaching, yet things between my mother-in-law and me are hardly settled. Were more at odds than anything, certainly nowhere near perfect.

Before our wedding, I asked my husband if hed introduce me to his mother, since hed already met my mum. He kept putting it offeither there wasnt enough time, or my mum was busy, or something else got in the way. Youll have plenty of time to get to know each other, hed say. In the end, we finally met on our wedding day. It was all rather awkward: my cheerful Good morning! was met with a tight-lipped Morning, barely muttered.

My husband had always sung his mums praises, insisting she was wonderfully understanding. Still, I once confessed my worry that she might meddle in our livesId seen so many situations turn sour for that very reason. He quickly assured me, Mums nothing like that. She always said Id choose my own wife and start my own family, and shed never interfere. Not long after the wedding, my husband came home from work, sitting pensively at the kitchen table with his tea. When I asked what was bothering him, his answer was the last thing I expected:

I think my mum might not like you.

Apparently, my mother-in-law disapproved of how I didnt wash eggs with bicarbonate of soda before using them, or that I occasionally left dishes in the sink for convenience. She was unimpressed that I put the dish sponge on the sink rather than on a separate plate, and thought it dreadful that I made stock all at once instead of with fresh water each time. There were many little things like that. I was left genuinely stunned.

I asked my husband, Why would she care how I do things? Were our own family now. She doesnt even live with us.

But Im her son! Im used to doing things her way. You need to do things like she does!

I protested that my kitchen is my own, and I should be free to run it as I see fitsurely things would be different in our own home.

Yet he insisted that, from now on, things would be done differently, and I needed to adapt.

Oddly, after that argument, we had a decent four months. When we saw my mother-in-law, shed smile politely, ask how things were, enquire about our married life, and how her son helped around the house. But after we adopted a dog, suddenly within days, half the neighbourhood seemed to know that I didnt cook up bones and meat for it. I was apparently foolish for feeding the poor pup raw food. My poor mother-in-law, so the gossip went, was suffering at the hands of such a careless daughter-in-law. Word spread, and I felt totally useless.

I hadnt even realised I was so incompetent until I heard about it from a neighbour Id met while out walking the dog. I hated hearing this about myself from a stranger, and I asked my husband to have a word with his mother. He just laughed it off and advised me to forget the whole thing. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law grew increasingly frosty, offering only clipped, cold greetings whenever we spoke.

Now, my husbands decided that I dont show enough respect to his mother. He says I refuse to accept their family ways and that I dont try to get closer to her. It seems his mum rather misses the dog. By the way, his parents would often appear at our front door for tea, completely unannounced.

But the real challenge is still ahead of me, because soon well have to move in with his parents for a while. I honestly dont know how Ill manage it there. And if we ever have a baby, I can just imagineIm sure the entire street will be told exactly how I bathe and feed the child! Maybe Ill have to go back home to my parents. I have serious doubts my mother-in-law would ever let me live peacefully under her roof.