How Our Son’s Mother-in-Law Took Him Away From Us

Since our son got married, he hardly visits us anymore. Now he spends nearly all his time with his mother-in-law, who, for some reason, constantly needs urgent help. I truly cant fathom how she managed before her daughter wed our son.

Its been over two years since James married. After their wedding, they moved out, settling into the flat wed bought for him when he started university. From early childhood, James always received our support; we understood him well and tried to guide him thoughtfully. Even before tying the knot, he lived on his own, as his place was close to work.

I wont claim I ever disliked Charlotte, my daughter-in-law, though I did worry back then that she simply wasnt mature enough for married life. James is only two years older than she is, but she has always seemed childlike, sometimes even a little spoilt. James is such a gentle soul, and I often wondered how hed manage alongside someone with her temperament.

Once I met Charlotte and her mother, Margaret, it all began to make sense. Margaret and I are the same age, yet she behaves as though she hasnt grown up at all. I dont know if youve ever encountered someone with a childs outlook even when they are well past middle agepeople who are terribly helpless and rather infantile. When Charlotte married, Margaret had already been divorced six times.

I never had much to say to her; she lives in her own world, but thankfully never forced herself into our lives. Our communication was limited to polite congratulations at the wedding and little else.

Red flags began to show before the wedding, with Charlotte repeatedly dragging James over to her mothers house to fix things: a leaky tap, an electrical socket that needed replacing, a kitchen shelf that had collapsed. At first, I ignored itperhaps a household without a man needs a bit of extra help, I reasoned.

Yet the number of household disasters at Margarets flat didnt decrease. James stopped coming by, always explaining he and Charlotte were off to help her mum instead. They started celebrating every holiday at Margarets, leaving just the three of us at ours: me, my husband David, and Margaret.

It hurt when James stopped joining us for family gatherings, but worse was his disregard when we needed him ourselves. Wed bought a new fridge, and I asked James to help us move it. He agreed, but then rang to say he couldnt make it because he and Charlotte were heading to her mum againher washing machine was leaking this time.

When I spoke to James, I could hear Charlotte in the background, questioning whether we couldnt just hire a removals team. James arrived eventually, and he was in a dreadful mood.

Dad, couldnt you have just got someone to deliver it? he grumbled. Now Im lugging this thing myself.

I lost a little heart, wondering why Margaret didnt simply hire professionals herself. Is she living in a parallel universe where repairmen dont exist? James told us that Margaret avoids tradesmen now because they always cheat herovercharging, doing shoddy work.

David finally snapped, remarking perhaps Margaret was clueless about appliances but an expert at shepherdinga comment about her ability to herd people. James was furious with his father and stormed out. I didnt interfere. I actually agreed with DavidMargaret and Charlotte have leaned far too much on James. Hes become her plumber, her mechanic, and meanwhile, hes forgotten where we live.

Since that argument, James hasnt spoken to David for over two weeks. David refuses to make the first move, and Im torn between them. David isnt wrong, but I wish hed been gentler. Now James is stubborn, and I fear losing him over something so trivial.

David wont reach out. James insists he wont speak to his dad unless he apologises first. In all of this, the only person thriving seems to be Margaret.