З життя
Sasha Dreaded the Days When Prospective Adoptive Parents Visited the Children’s Home—In Seven Years Living There, She Had Never Once Been Chosen
Sarah simply loathed the days when prospective adopters would visit the orphanage. In all her seven years within those old stone walls, not once had anyone chosen her.
Once, when she was but a small child, she had looked forward to those days. Spellbound, she would gaze at the smartly dressed ladies and gentlemeneach seeming to her like a magician who might spirit her away to their own castle. She dreamed of a new mother kissing her goodnight, a new father carrying her on his shoulders, and a bedroom to call her own. She would no longer have to see that pesky Victor every dayhe was always tugging her plaits and calling her Chaffinch.
Sarah had no idea what the word meant, but it stung all the same. Victor, as ever, would call out, Chaffinch! Chaffinch! with relentless glee.
She had come to the orphanage at five, after her parents had died in a terrible car crash. For the longest time, she couldn’t grasp why her mother and father never came for her, or why they had left her behind. In time, she learned the hard truththey were gone for good. Their faces faded in her memory, their voices became echoes, their scents lost to the past. Even the old home they lived in together turned to mist in her mind.
All she wished for was to be chosen, just once. But miracles are rare and as the years passed, she began to understand: a plain girl did not get picked. It was always the pretty lasses, with gleaming hair ribboned in bows and sweet smiles, who went off to new families.
Victor never stopped teasing her, though now Sarah knew a chaffinch was just a small, lively bird.
On one such day when visitors came again, all the girls were dressed up and their hair tied with ribbons. But Sarah, growing weary of hope, cropped her hair short like a boys. She decided then she would never let anyone else choose for her; from now on, shed make her own choices.
When the matron saw her shorn head, she gasped, and Victoras expectedcalled again, Chaffinch!
By then, Sarah was twelve; Victor three years her senior.
That day no one picked her. Her ragged haircut looked too bold, and a fierce spark had replaced the innocence in her eyes.
Three years later, Victor finally left the orphanage. After saying his farewells, he unexpectedly turned to her.
Well then, goodbye, Chaffinch?
Goodbye, then, she replied indifferently.
Hang in there! Its not long nowjust three years leftand then Ill come for you! he said, with a kind of stubborn certainty.
As if! Who says Id ever choose you? Idiot! she snapped back.
Victor gave her a long, unreadable look, then walked away, never glancing back.
When Sarah at last closed the orphanage door behind her, she stepped into the wide world and breathed in the air of freedom. Over the years she had transformedfrom awkward duckling to striking swan. She now had glorious hair brushing her waist, large green eyes, and a graceful figure. She set out for her familys old flat, when suddenly a familiar voice called,
Hullo, Chaffinch!
She spun around. There was Victor.
What are you doing here? she demanded.
I promised to fetch you, didnt I? So here I am. Victor came closer.
I told you, Ill do the choosing! Sarah huffed, looking up at him. Hed shot up and grown broad-shouldered since shed last seen him.
Then choose me, Sarah, he pleaded gently.
Ill think about it. She strode off towards her new life.
Victor walked with her all the way to her front steps, waiting until shed gone inside before leaving himself. Every evening thereafter, he would sit on the bench outside her window, only rising once her flats light went out.
The golden days of summer faded to a drizzly autumn, then to winters chill, but Victor kept coming. At last, Sarah approached him one freezing evening.
Aren’t you tired of this? You must be cold, sitting here night after night.
Its nothing. I can bear itjust choose me, please, he replied softly, his gaze full of longing.
Startled, Sarah jumped up and fled indoors, peering through the lace curtain as Victor watched her windows.
On the 31st of December, Sarah hurried home from workthere was still so much to do before the New Year celebration: lay the table, don her new dress. She noticed Victor was not on the bench. Her heart skippedhad something happened?
With the flat tidy and a glass of sparkling wine in hand, she peered into the darkness for him. He was nowhere to be seen. Dread twisted in her belly.
What should I do? Search for him? But I havent his address or number! Foolish girl, what a fool Ive been! she scolded herself.
In that very moment, something flashed outside her window.
Ah, the fireworks are starting, she thought, and drew near to watch.
Blazing brightly in the snow, gigantic fiery letters spelled out:
CHOOSE ME, SARAH!!!
There was Victor on the bench, waving up at her, hope shining in his eyes.
