З життя
Доля знає своє: через 13 років я знову обійняв кохану
Випускний вечір обіцяв стати особливим моментом мого життя, навіть якщо дівчини в мене не було. Я вірив, що доля все розставить на свої місця і що я зрозумію, з ким проведу цей вечір.
Того вечора я одягнув вишуканий темний костюм, пригладив волосся перед дзеркалом та, отримавши батьківське благословення, вирушив у ресторан, де ми святкували.
Посеред сяючих посмішок і різнобарвних суконь погляд зупинився на дівчині, яка теж була одна. Я знав її – Оксана навчалася в паралельному класі, але ми не спілкувалися раніше.
Лише тепер я побачив, яка вона особлива. Струнка, граційна, з глибокими карими очима і довгими світлими косами, що спадали на її тендітні плечі.
Не пам’ятаю, як набрався сміливості, але підійшов до неї, простягнув руку і запросив на танець. І відтоді аж до самого ранку я танцював лише з нею.
Наступного дня я вже знав – це моя дівчина. Я закохався.
Але доля вирішила інакше.
Розбите серце
Оксана не відчувала до мене того ж. Я дізнався, що вона давно зустрічалася з хлопцем з іншого міста, який мав повернутися після навчання. Вони збиралися одружитися.
Я не міг у це повірити.
Два роки я жив у очікуванні. Сподівався, що вона передумає і побачить мене по-іншому. Стояв під її вікнами, ховався в тіні, коли вона виходила на вулицю. Хотів, щоб вона мене побачила, але боявся, що вона помітить мій біль.
Кожен її погляд, кожне не сказане мені слово розривало серце.
Але я нічого не зміг вдіяти.
Коли Оксана все ж вийшла заміж, я стояв осторонь, спостерігаючи за її весіллям.
Тоді я поклявся собі: я буду чекати.
Я намагався почати стосунки з іншими, але жодна дівчина не могла зайняти її місце. Все було не те, все відчувалося порожнім і безглуздим.
Так минуло довгих 13 років.
Другий шанс від долі
Та одного дня трапилася біда.
Оксана і її чоловік потрапили в аварію. Він загинув на місці. Вона вижила дивом, але залишилася з травмою на все життя, змушена ходити із тростиною.
Доля знову дала мені шанс.
Але я знав, що не можу просто так увірватися в її життя.
Я чекав.
І лише коли нам обом виповнилося по 35, я вперше зміг взяти її за руку.
Вона дивилася на мене довгим поглядом, сповненим втоми, болю, а, можливо, й жалю.
– Чому ти досі тут? – тихо спитала вона.
Я не знав, як відповісти. Бо любив її? Бо ніколи не забував? Бо чекав, що зможу сказати все?
Я просто притягнув її до себе і обійняв.
З того моменту ми були разом.
Випробування, які ми пройшли
Ми прожили 10 років, повних щастя. Звісно, дітей у нас не було. Після аварії Оксана більше не могла їх мати.
Але мені було все одно.
Я любив її. Любив її сиву пасму в волоссі, яку вона не фарбувала. Любив її втомлену посмішку. Любив її, навіть коли її обличчя втрачало фарби від болю.
Та доля знову забрала її у мене.
Оксана захворіла. Лікарі казали, що є шанс, але вона відмовилася від лікування.
– Я не боюся, – сказала вона одного разу.
Вона лише зробила одне: обстригла своє волосся.
– Навіщо? – запитав я, приголомшений.
– Хочу віддати тим, хто ще може боротися, – відповіла вона.
Її прекрасні світлі коси перетворилися на перуку для іншої жінки, якій вдалося перемогти недугу.
Оксана знала, що їй уже не судилося виграти цю битву.
Я тримав її руку до останньої миті.
І якби я міг прожити життя знову, я б нічого не змінив. Я б знову чекав на неї. Я б знову любив її.
Бо Оксана була моїм серцем. Моєю долею. Моєю життям.
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