For years I stayed silent and put up with my mum. But one incident changed everything

When I was seventeen, my dad passed away. My mum was working two jobs just to keep us afloat, but it was never really enough. We saved on absolutely everythingno holidays, no meals out, not even a new pair of shoes unless it was absolutely necessary. We only had fruit and sweets in the house at Christmas, that kind of thing. I never dared to ask my mum for anything. I tried to make my own money for the things I needed. I also have a little sister, so mum and I did our best to make sure she never felt left out or different from anyone else.
But losing Dad wasnt the end of our troubles. Not long after, my mum had a stroke and ended up in hospital. She couldnt walk after that. She was given disability benefits, but it barely covered the basics. Things were tough, but I kept hoping wed get through it.
I had to drop out of college because suddenly I was the only one providing for the family. Looking after my poorly mum and my little sister was so hard. Lots of people offered to help, but I always turned them down. Mum used to be so warm and kind before she got ill, but after the stroke, she changed completely.
First, shed just complain about how unlucky she was, but then it started to be about me and my sisterhow we couldnt cook properly, or we never cleaned the house well enough, or that we spent too much on ourselves.
I tried my best not to take her words to heart. I knew she was suffering and things were tough, but it still hurt. I was doing everything for her, but she never seemed to notice or appreciate it. Friends would constantly tell me I should hire a nurse for her and find a new jobthere were places I could have earned much more money. But then, who would look after Mum? How could I let a stranger care for her when she has two daughters? I just couldnt do it.
But her moaning just seemed to get worse. Shed have a go at us for every little thing we bought, and it wasnt like we were splashing out on anything unnecessary. I bit my tongue for a long time. But then one day, everything changed.
I came down with somethinghorrible headache, fever, kept coughing and I just couldnt sleep at all. By morning, I decided I needed to go to the GP. My little sister saw how rough I was looking, gave me a hug before school, and begged me not to put off seeing a doctor. But Mum, as always, just said I didnt need any medicinethe young can fight it off, and she had it far worse. She said she needed the money more than I did and accused me of not caring about herof wanting her to die if I wasted what little we had on an appointment. She had a go at me for spending all our cash on tests and doctors advice for just a cold.
Listening to her say all that, I quietly cried. Honestly, I was at the end of my rope. I dropped out of college and picked up difficult jobs so I could look after her, even when I had other choices. I guess I was just so tired and overwhelmed that day that I snappedI finally let her have it and told her everything I was feeling.
The doctors tests showed I actually had pneumonia. He wanted me in hospital, but that just wasnt possible. There was no way I could leave my sister alone with Mum. So I picked up my antibiotics from the chemist and went straight to a friends for a bit of peace.
Harriet, bless her, let me in straight away. She told me off for dragging myself about town when I shouldve been in bed. We had a long chat and I finally told her what had been going on with my mum and asked for help finding a carer and maybe somewhere to stay. I really couldnt keep living at home.
Harriet said I could stay with her for a while and sent me back to get some essentials. When I went home, Mum was screaming like mad the minute I stepped in. She wasnt bothered to ask how I wasjust started on about money, as usual. I gave her dinner and then went up to my room. I knew I couldnt stay there any longer.
Harriet is a starshe soon found a carer for Mum and let me move in. I changed jobs and I dont go back to see Mum much now. I know it makes me look heartless, but I genuinely did everything I could for her. I never once heard a single thank you. Was it all really worth it? I dont know, but Ive still got my whole life ahead.
Every month, I send money for Mums expenses and to pay for her carer. I even send more than they really need. Victoria, who looks after Mum now, says shes getting quite forgetfuleven on our birthdays, she doesnt send any wishes. My sister and I always remember, though. Anyway, the important thing is, I managed to find a new job, and soon my sister and I will rent a flat together. Shes really supportive and says, Youve got to look after your parentsjust not when doing so is slowly killing you.So thats what we did. The first night in our own place, my sister and I cooked spaghetti and laughed over burnt garlic bread. It wasnt perfect, but it was ours. That night, as we sat on the floor surrounded by boxes and our mismatched furniture, I realized we still had each other. Life had taken a lot from usour dad, our sense of childhood, and, in its own way, our mum. But it hadnt taken away the bond between me and my sister, or the hope that maybe things could get better, even just a bit at a time.
Sometimes I still feel guilty, but Im learning to live with it. The world isnt always fair, but Ive made peace with the choices I had to make. Most nights now, my phone is quiet. No angry calls, no desperate pleas. Just my sisters laughter from the other room, and the gentle hum of a life were building on our own terms.
Years from now, Ill remember those heavy days and know I survived themscarred, maybe, but stronger for it. I gave everything I could, and then finally, when there was nothing left, I chose to give myself a chance. And in that, I think, theres nothing to be ashamed of at all.