З життя
How the Mother-in-Law Turns the Weekend into a Nightmare
**”How My Mother-in-Law Turns Weekends Into a Nightmare”**
If someone had told me a year ago that my rare, precious weekends would turn into backbreaking labourleaving every muscle aching and tears in my eyesI wouldnt have believed them. But here we are. The blame lies entirely with my mother-in-law, the formidable Margaret Whitmore, who decided that because my husband, James, and I live in a high-rise flat with no garden, we must have endless free time. Naturally, that meant we were fair game for her endless chores.
James and I have been married just over a year. We had a modest weddingmoney was tight, and in our city, every penny counts. My parents helped us with a small Victorian flat. It wasnt in the best shape, so we planned gradual renovationsa tap here, some wallpaper there, new flooring in the kitchen. Funds were scarce, and time even scarcer.
Meanwhile, James parents own a countryside cottage with a sprawling garden, chickens, ducks, a goat, and even two cows. They live on the outskirts, where many cling to their land like relics of a bygone era. That was their choice, their project. We respect it, but its not for us.
Margaret disagreed. The moment she learned we were “living the easy life in the city, no garden, no responsibilities,” she began summoning us regularlyfirst under the guise of “just visiting.” Soon, every Saturday and Sunday came with explicit orders: *”Come and help!”* Not for relaxation, not for a breakjust work. The second we arrived, shed shove a broom, a hoe, or a bucket into our hands. Smile, and off to the garden we went.
At first, I thought, *Fine, well help a few times, show were part of the family.* James tried reasoning with her: *”Weve got renovations, no time, stressful jobs.”* But Margarets stubbornness knew no bounds. *”You live like royalty in that flat! Everything here falls on my shoulders!”* Excuses about exhaustion meant nothing. *”What could you possibly have to do in that tiny place? We raised younow its your turn to give back!”*
Honestly, I wanted to be a good daughter-in-law. No drama. But then, on one visit, she handed me a bucket of water and a cloth. *”While I make lunch, mop the entire floorright down to the shed and back. And James can sand those planks; the chicken coop needs fixing.”* I tried politely refusing, saying I was wiped from the workweek. She didnt even listen. As if I were some paid hand daring to slack off.
By Sunday evening, every muscle screamed. Monday, I overslept for work. My boss was shockedI never called in sick, yet there I was, barely functioning. I lied and said I felt ill. All thanks to a *”relaxing”* weekend at the in-laws. No joy, no gratitudejust resentment.
The worst part? Wed explained, repeatedly: *We have our own lives, were exhausted, the flats a mess!* Yet Margaret called daily: *”When are you coming? The garden wont till itself!”* When we said no, she snapped, *”Whats taking so long with those renovations? Building Buckingham Palace?”*
Her audacity stunned meespecially when she flat-out said, *”I was counting on you. Youre a woman. You should learn to milk cows and grow vegetablesitll do you good.”* I stayed silent, but inside, I seethed. I never wanted country life. I dont need to shovel manure to feel accomplished.
James backed me. He was just as fed up. He used to visit his parents willinglynow it was pure obligation. He ignored her calls because they were nothing but guilt trips. Every trip there left me scrambling for excuses.
Finally, I rang my mum and poured it all out. She understood. *”Help should be voluntary,”* she said. *”You cant turn a young couple into unpaid labour. If you let this slide, itll only get worse.”*
Im exhausted. Juggling city work, flat renovations, and farm labour. All I want is a lie-in. A weekend with a book or film, not a shovel and dirt.
James thinks we should lay down an ultimatum: either Margaret stops the forced labour, or we cut ties. Harsh? Maybe. But we have our own lives, dreams, goals. We didnt sign up for indentured servitude.
And if anyone says, *”Thats just family,”* *”You should help your parents,”*I wont argue. But help means being *asked*, not ordered. It means gratitude, not guilt. It means having a choice, not chores dumped on you.
Maybe winter will freeze Margarets zeal. And I*finally*can breathe. And remember that weekends are for resting, not servitude.
In the end, Ive learned: duty shouldnt be endured out of obligation, and love cant be forced through labour. Some boundaries, you have to draw yourselfor others will draw them for you.
