I Can’t Imagine How I Ended Up Raising Children Like That

A year has passed since I was left on my own. After my wifes funeral, I slowly collected myself and realised that, on top of feeling lonely, I had a much bigger problem. I was suddenly short of money desperately so. Ive always lived with great care, never spending on anything unnecessary, but even so, those unexpected costs crop up back and forth to the GP, and whatever the chemist charges for prescriptions.

My wife and I brought up two children. We did our best to help them, gave them everything we could, and every last penny seemed to go on their needs. Most of what we had for the house ended up going to support the children and their families. I dont know what life has earmarked for me, but either way, the house will end up belonging to my son and daughter once Im gone, unless I choose otherwise in my will not that I have any intention of changing that. Theyre both sensible people; they understand the value of a home in England, and the opportunity that inheriting this place will bring.

Ive tried, tentatively, to let them know how much Im struggling financially. If they could just cover the ever-increasing council tax and utility bills, I wouldnt be forced to worry about what Ill do for money between pension payments. My daughter acted as if she hadnt the slightest idea what I was talking about, and my sons wife controls all the finances in their household, so my hints and quiet requests just vanished into thin air.

I have a fair idea of what both my son and daughter earn, and I am, truly, pleased for them that they can afford cars, holidays abroad. My grandchildren always seem to have plenty of money for whatever they fancy, and watching them splash out amounts equal to my entire pension sometimes makes me wonder: did we really raise such thoughtless children? Are they honestly not bothered to see their own father living so modestly, if not struggling? My wife and I always tried to lead by example wed visit our own parents bearing armfuls of groceries, buying them their medicine, settling up with the doctor, and so on.

A friend of mine suggested moving in with one of the children not that Id considered it, and certainly without discussing it with them and renting out my house. Its not a solution I would choose willingly, but it may become necessary if another conversation with the children doesnt change anything. The truth is, I simply cant survive on my pension, and whatever savings I had have always gone to the children.

Ive come to realise that, no matter how much you give to family, its no guarantee the kindness will come back when you need it. Sometimes you have to find your own way and look after yourself first.