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«Как же она меня достала!» — хотела я крикнуть. Но сдержалась. А она опять пришла с чемоданом на выходные…

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«Ну сколько можно!» — чуть не вырвалось у меня, когда я увидела сестру мужа на пороге. Но сдержалась. А она, как ни в чём не бывало, — снова с чемоданом на выходные…

Меня зовут Аграфена, мне тридцать девять. Со Святославом мы женаты уже двенадцать лет. Живём неплохо, крепко, сын подрастает, вроде бы всё ладно. Но есть одна беда, которая годами отравляет моё существование. Это его сестра — Алевтина.

Алевтина старше Святослава на восемь лет. Замужем не была, детей нет. Живёт одна в соседнем доме, но… по сути, живёт у нас. Я не преувеличиваю. Она появляется в нашей квартире, как тень, — бесшумно, назойливо и каждый день. Порой мне кажется, что у неё ключи от нашей двери растут прямо из сумочки.

Сначала я старалась быть любезной, даже приветливой. Ну, сестра мужа, родная кровь. Думала, зайдёт, поболтает, чаю попьёт — и уйдёт. Но она приходила каждый вечер. И в выходные. И в отпуск. И когда мы звали гостей. Даже когда я лежала с температурой — она приходила.

Алевтина — человек без границ. Вечно всем недовольна: как я готовлю, как сына воспитываю, как одеваюсь. То я слишком тихая, то слишком громкая, то пирог не пропёкся, то квартира «запущенная». Но главное — она не просит, она требует. А я молчу. Потому что не люблю ссор. Потому что Святослав говорит: «Груня, потерпи, она же одна, кроме нас — никого».

Терпела. Но терпение — не бездонное.

Алевтина работает бухгалтером в конторе. Возвращается раньше меня и… идёт к нам. Я прихожу — а она уже на диване, телевизор орет, кот забился под шкаф. Сын в телефоне. А она — как хозяйка. Суп остывает. А то и я жду, пока она освободит ванну. Ужинает с нами, потом часами тарахтит про свои «подвиги» в налоговой, которых никто не слушает. Потом уходит. А иногда остаётся ночевать — то «гроза страшная», то «дом холодный».

Когда мы собирались куда-то поехать — Алевтина ехала с нами. Не важно, что я мечтала провести выходные с мужем. Не важно, что он обещал свозить меня на юг в день рождения. Алевтина была там. В нашем номере. Спала рядом. И всё — за счёт Святослава. Хотя зарплату она получает приличную, копит, как сама говорит, «на чёрный день». Видимо, решила, что этот день — я.

А мать Святослава и вовсе считает меня неблагодарной. Мол, Алевтина же родная, просто одинокая, ей нужна семья. И я понимаю, что у неё нет ни мужа, ни детей. Но почему мой покой должен за это расплачиваться?

Однажды я прямо сказала Святославу:

— Хватит. У неё нет границ. Она везде. Это невыносимо!

Он только развёл руками:

— Ну что я могу? Она же сестра…

Недавно был последний капля. Мы с мужем пошли в театр — наконец-то вдвоём. Уговорила подругу посидеть с сыном. Только сели — звонок. Алевтина.

— Это где вы?! Почему меня не позвали?! Вы что, меня выбросили?! — орала она в трубку.

А через два дня — опять пришла. С сумкой. С ночнушкой. С любимым сериалом. Объявила: «Выходные свободные, решила провести их с вами».

Я стояла на кухне, вцепясь в край стола. Чуть не закричала. Но промолчала. А внутри что-то сломалось.

Я не знаю, как сказать Святославу, что больше так не могу. Что мне нужен дом без третьего взрослого. Бесконечных советов. Скандалов. Без Алевтины.

И боюсь, что если ничего не изменится — мне придётся уйти. Просто чтобы снова дышать. Потому что даже любовь не выдержит, когда между тобой и мужем — ещё одна жизнь. Слишком громкая. Слишком навязчивая. Слишком чужая.

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First aid administered, Ian gallantly volunteered to help in the kitchen—though his efforts mostly consisted of philosophical musings like, “A salad is a state of mind, not just ingredients,” which was about what Helen and Kate had come to expect. — What’s this box, Helen? — Maisie called from the lounge. — “Happy New Year” written on it. Oh, there’s a note. “Open at midnight. From Gran Val.” Helen ran to see. — Oh! I completely forgot! Kate, this was from Gran—she said to open it on New Year’s, around two in the morning. Promised it’d be a surprise. https://clck.ru/3R62hu — Wonder what’s inside? — Kate eyed the box curiously. — Let’s open it now! Helen shook her head urgently. — You can’t! She’ll ask. You’ll see. What if there’s some sort of secret lock? We’d ruin the surprise. Let’s do just what Gran said—wait. Now everyone was intrigued—even Auntie Gail settled closer, eyeing the box with interest. *** They listened to the Prime Minister’s speech, clinked glasses of prosecco, ate “cat salad”, laughed and argued, then finally— — Is it two yet? — Helen checked. — Well, it’s time! — She ceremoniously raised the box. — Gran Val’s surprise! The only man present was entrusted with opening it. Ian fiddled with the lid and lifted it. Inside, cushioned with cotton wool, were no banknotes or old photos, but dozens of tiny, colourfully tied scrolls, each with a name tag attached. — What’s all this? — Ian asked, bewildered. Helen picked up the first scroll labelled “Helen” and read aloud: — “My darling granddaughter Helen. Did things go wrong again today? Broken washing machine? Cat ate the salad? Don’t worry! Any problem is just a reason to order pizza and binge-watch your favourite show. Buy the cake in the morning. What matters is you’re surrounded by people who’ll help you eat that pizza. Love you to the moon and back. Gran Val.” The living room fell silent—then erupted in laughter. Helen laughed so hard tears streamed from her eyes. — How… How did she know?! — That’s magic, — Auntie Gail murmured. — Mine! Give me mine! — Kate asked, hand outstretched. She unrolled her scroll. — “Katie, love. Stop quarrelling with Ian over silly things. Give him a hug instead. He’s a good one—even if he does ramble on. If he starts again, just kiss him. It’s the surest way to win any argument. Love to you both.” Ian blushed to his roots and immediately kissed Kate as everyone cheered. Maisie giggled and unrolled hers: — “Maisie, my lovely. Stop looking for love in bars and try the library, or even the corner shop. Normal boys are there too—just not in those strange skinny jeans. Oh, and please, ditch the purple hair dye; your natural colour suits you!” — How did she know about the hair?! — Maisie wailed. — I only changed it two days ago! At last, it was Auntie Gail’s turn. She opened her note as if it were a State Secret. — “Dear Gail. I know you’re the wisest in the family, always in the loop. But here’s one secret for you: kindness and wise words are wonderful, but sometimes it’s best to just stay quiet and enjoy a slice of cake. Love you lots.” Auntie Gail reddened, mumbled something, took a piece of cake and fell silent—for the first New Year in living memory, she didn’t give a single slice of advice. https://clck.ru/3R636x The laughter and conversation lasted till morning. The girls video-called Gran Val, who smiled from her armchair in another city and said, “Darlings! I’m so glad my surprise worked! No magic—just a Gran who knows and loves you all!” Next morning, as Helen tidied up, she gathered the scrolls into a pretty jar and set it in pride of place. 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