З життя
Mother, I Forgive You!
Hey love, youve got to hear this its a wild, heartbreaking tale I just heard and Im still shaking.
Mum, I forgive you! thats how it ends, but let me take you back to the beginning.
Margaret Clarke lay in her bed, and one quiet evening she called her daughter over.
Emily, darling, Im dying. Its time I told you everything. Im scared I dont have long left. Forgive me, my girl!
Mum, dont say that! Ill call an ambulance right now!
Dont, love. Just listen to me, Margaret whispered, her voice trembling.
She began her story: It all started many years ago, love. I had a close friend, Claire. We grew up in a children’s home together, then both went on to train as teachers. After we finished, we were both posted to a tiny village school.
The authorities sent us to different lodgings they put me in a little empty cottage by the school, and Claire with an elderly couple nearby. All our free time we spent together, sneaking off to the village hall for dances with the local accordion band. The accordion player was a handsome lad. From the moment I saw him I knew he was the one Id been waiting for all my life. His name was James, darkeyed and striking.
Every weekend Claire and I would race down to the hall. I couldnt take my eyes off James, and his soulful voice made my heart flutter each time he glanced my way. Then I noticed he kept looking at Claire, smiling at her, and she would light up like a sunrise. I realised James preferred the quiet, shy Claire over me.
I tried everything to catch his attention, but he never noticed me at all. I was furious, jealous, and I grew to hate Claire with a passion. She seemed to glow with happiness, oblivious to the hatred seething inside me. One day she burst into the cottage, beaming, and whispered, Margaret, James and I are getting married soon.
In that instant my world collapsed. I felt completely crushed, stopped eating, stopped sleeping, and all I could think of was that James should be mine alone. Id do anything for that. I heard from locals that a strange old woman, Martha, lived in the next hamlet, and I went to her for help.
The reason youre here is clear, the crone said.
Fear gripped me at first, but remembering James gave me the courage to ask for something dark. Martha brewed a love potion, poured it into a bottle and handed it to me.
Pour this into his drink, she croaked.
I tried to slip her some money, but she laughed wildly.
Your cash means nothing to me. Youll learn what I want later. Go, she snarled.
That night Claire and James dropped by. It was the perfect chance. I set the table quickly, slipped the potion into Jamess glass when he wasnt looking. He drank it, and something in him changed. Claire, sensing something off, took him home. The next morning James stood on my doorstep, insisting he belonged only with me. The witchs promise held true I finally had the man Id coveted. We married soon after and lived blissfully. James poured his soul into me, and I couldnt breathe without him. You might wonder what happened to Claire.
She started avoiding us, but we still ran into each other now and then. I still see her sorrowful face, her tearfilled eyes. The elderly couple whod housed her spat at me, calling me a witch. Rumours spread through the village that Claire had become pregnant by James and almost took her own life. I felt sorry for her, but I loved my husband more than anything.
One day an old man named George, who lived with Claire, knocked on our door.
Come with me, he said gruffly.
Why? I asked.
Your friend is dying. Shes calling for you, he replied.
He looked at me, and without a word I followed him. In the couples house a child was wailing. On the bed lay Claire, pale and barely breathing. My heart ached, and I wanted to turn away, but then Claires eyes snapped open and she whispered hoarsely,
Margaret, Im dying. Take my baby. Let Emily have a father like yours, she begged, reaching for me, her hand trembling uselessly.
The old couple crossed themselves, murmuring prayers. Then Grandma Ethel, tears streaming, thrust a bundle into my arms. It was you, my little one. I didnt want to take you, but Georges voice thundered,
Id never have trusted this child to you! Yet the wishes of the dead must be honoured. She was a good soul, may she rest in peace. Take the girl and go home, and God forbid you ever hurt her again!
So you arrived, my dear. Your father was furious that Id taken you. Your endless crying drove him mad, and it drove me mad too. James changed he started drinking, often stayed out all night. My happy life crumbled before my eyes, and I felt powerless. Dear child, you cant imagine how much I came to despise you!
I dreamed of having my own child, and then you fell into my life. Soon enough I discovered I was pregnant. When James learned this, he gave up the bottle, began dreaming of a son. It seemed happiness might finally settle in our home. A few weeks before the birth, I had a nightmare. I was in a dark forest clearing, a hideous creature with black, matted fur staring at me, its claws reaching out.
Do you know me? it hissed in Marthas voice. Ive come for whats mine.
I woke screaming in pain, and by evening I delivered a stillborn boy. Your father, devastated, drowned his sorrows in drink and died not long after, frozen in a snowdrift. George and Ethel followed shortly thereafter. I was left alone with you on a bleak, white world. Emily, you became the meaning of my sinful life; I could not picture existence without you.
You grew up looking just like your mother. I tried for years to tell you the truth, to ask forgiveness, but never managed. You married, had a wonderful grandson. Now I have no time left to put off this heavy confession, and Im terrified to leave this world bearing such a burden.
She fell silent for a moment.
Im responsible for your parents deaths. Will you forgive me, my child? My sin is great before God and before you.
Emily shivered, tears streaming down her cheeks. She gathered all her strength, wrapped her arms around the frail woman looking at her with pleading eyes, and whispered,
Mum, I forgive you.
Margaret Clarke slipped away that night in her sleep, a faint smile frozen on her lips.
