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My Husband and I Came to the Countryside to Meet His Parents for the First Time — The Warm Welcome, Home-Cooked Meals, and Tall Tales Around the Kitchen Table Would Change Everything
My husband and I have just arrived in the countryside to meet his parents for the first time.
Harrys mum steps out onto the porch, hands on hips, looking like a proper matron at her Sunday tea. She calls out, Oh, Harry! You mightve mentioned you werent coming by yourself!
Harry sweeps me into a bear hug and presses me tightly. Meet my wife, mum this is Emily.
This larger-than-life woman, tied into a floral apron, marches over with open arms and greets me with a warm Well, hello there, duck! Then, by tradition, she kisses me three times on the cheek.
Mrs. Florence Brown smells of sharp garlic and freshly baked bread. She hugs me so tightly I feel a little overwhelmed, my head pressed between two generously padded cushions her bosom. She pauses and gives me a once-over from head to toe, then says to Harry, Where on earth did you find such a slip of a thing, Harry?
Harry chuckles, Where else, in the city! We met at the library. Is Dad home?
Hes next door, helping Mrs. Campbell with her Aga. Come inside now, off with your shoes Ive just mopped the floors.
Outside, a group of curious village children gawk at us from the drive. Johnny, pop round to Mrs. Smith’s and tell Mr. Brown his sons turned up with a bride!
Im on it! shouts the boy as he sprints down the lane.
Inside, Harry helps me out of my chic coat a bargain from the clearance section and hangs it next to the stove to warm through. He presses my cold red hands to the tiled hearth and gives me a kiss on the cheek, Youre my treasure! Still warm
Suddenly, pots and pans clang, stoneware jugs thump on the table, glasses and cutlery rattle, and the kitchen takes on a festive hum. While Florence sets the table, I take in their country cottage holy icons in the corner, white lace curtains dotted with flowers, handwoven rugs, and stools by the fire. Beside the range, a ginger tabby cat dozes contentedly, its head turned away from us.
We tied the knot just last week, Harrys voice reaches me as though from afar.
Im amazed at how quickly the table fills with food. At the centre, a proud ham in aspic, with pickled cabbage and tomatoes alongside, steaming milk with a golden skin from the range, and a flaky pie filled with chopped egg and spring onions.
My goodness, Ive never felt so ravenous!
Mum, youve outdone yourself! Weve enough here for a week, Harry mutters, biting into a thick slice of homemade bread.
Florence clunks a frosty glass bottle of ale down beside the ham and, pleased with herself, wipes her hands on her apron, Right, thats all set!
This was my first meeting with Harrys mum. Mother and son look as alike as two peas in a pod, both with dark hair and rosy cheeks. My Harry is mild and gentle, while his mum is a proper storm sudden, booming, and impossible to ignore. I bet more than a few wild horses and burning barns have been tamed by her steady hands.
The front door slams open, and a short man with a sooty jacket and whiff of smoke steps in, letting in a gust of cold air. Well, Ill be blowed! he exclaims and enfolds his son in a smoky hug.
Alright, Dad! Harry beams.
Wash your hands before you hug your mother! Florence admonishes.
Mr. Brown shakes my hand. How do you do, miss?
He has twinkling blue eyes full of mischief, a scraggly ginger beard, and a mop of copper curls.
Pour me some of that soup too, will you, love? he says to Florence, busying himself with the washbasin.
We raise our glasses together: To you, dears!
A couple of pints and plates later, I grow bold. Mr. Brown, why are all the men in your family called Harry?
He grins, Its simple, Emily! My granddad, my dad, and me all builders or stove-setters, going back generations. Young Harry heres the first one wanting to become a lathe operator instead.
Lathe operators are useful too, Dad! Harry interjects.
Is it hard work, stove-setting? I ask.
Its an art, my dear, Mr. Brown says, finger raised. To build it so its handsome, doesnt smoke, and bakes pies properly. Dont be fooled by my frame! Us gingers are made tough, kissed by the sun!
Florence chimes in with pride, My Harry can turn his hand to anything!
Dad, tell us a story! Harry laughs.
Mr. Brown sighs, strokes his beard, and winks, Alright then, heres a tale for you
One July, we all went out haymaking. Remember that old Blossom of ours, Florence? Not a cow, but a walking milk churn on stilts! Everyone came men, women, even us two. The sun hadnt yet crept up over the hills, but we were swinging the scythes: swish-swish, swish-swish.
That day was hot as a bakers oven, horseflies biting something fierce! And that summer wild boar were everywhere! Come lunchtime, we were wringing wet, ready to collapse.
I watched everyone and thought, time for a bit of mischief to liven folk up. Maybe the heat got to me I suddenly shout, Oi! Boars! Run for your lives! and scramble up a tree. Next thing I know, everyones dropped their tools and followed me up the nearest tree!
I cant help but laugh, And what happened then?
Well, nearly got walloped with a pitchfork afterward but work certainly picked up pace!
Florence sends her husband a mock slap, You cheeky rogue!
Dad, tell us about real wild boars! Harry prompts.
Mr. Brown grins, Alright, story number two. Back when Florence and I were young, before Harry was even a thought, I was mad for hunting. Havent bothered since this day.
It was snowing, and I decided to go shooting. Florence said, Go on then. Off I went, traipsing round the woods, but nothing doing. Just as I turned to leave, I heard the boars, close as anything. I snuck up, took aim, and missed! The biggest boar youve ever seen came charging. I bolted up a tree, scared out of my wits.
You nearly died of fright! Florence inserts.
Dont interrupt! So, I was up that tree the whole night the boar and the whole lot camped underneath, waiting. Lucky it wasnt a cold snap or Id have frozen solid. At dawn, Florence rallied the neighbours searching for me. She carried me home on her shoulder when they found me, barely able to walk!
Youre a marvel, Florence strong as an ox!
Oh, go on with you. Emily, would you like a cuppa? Weve got chamomile with a drop of honey.
Id love one, thanks so much.
Florence pours fragrant tea into mugs.
Dad, tell Emily how you fixed my aunts legs that summer! Harry teases.
Mr. Brown nearly chokes on his tea, laughing. Florences sister sent a telegram says shes coming to visit. We make her right at home. Over dinner, she moans about her legs aching and not wanting to go to the doctor.
I ask, Ever tried bee therapy? She says, Where am I going to get bees in the city?
I say, Come with me then! So out we go to the hives, and I tell her: Hitch up your skirt a bit, yes, above the knee I put a bee on each leg.
She thanked me at first, but half an hour later, shes cursing me to the heavens turns out shes allergic to bee stings! Her legs swelled up like footballs and she couldnt walk!
Florence cackles, Hes a proper Dr. Dolittle, isnt he?
How was I to know she was allergic? Neither of us knew Emily, do have some honey; youre not allergic, are you?
No, Mr. Brown!
Thats a blessing
We sip our tea.
Darkness falls outside and a deep tiredness sweeps over me. Florence draws the curtains. Harry, where do you two want to sleep?
Can we sleep up on the range, Mum? Emily, would you like to try the old oven bed?
Id love to!
Ill sort it! Florence boasts. Your dad built it himself, brick by brick.
Mr. Brown looks mighty proud. The range not only warms and feeds but gathers the family round.
The fire glows brightly alive, almost magical.
We thank our hosts and stand. Harry gives me a gentle boost up onto the range bed.
From the lofts shadowy corner wafts the scent of sun-baked brick, dried herbs, sheeps wool, and rustic loaves, layered by years.
Harry quickly drops off to sleep, but I lie awake, listening.
To my right, I hear deep, rhythmic breathing: Puff-puff, puff-puff
A house spirit! I think, recalling a nursery rhyme: Little brownie in the wall, were not here to trouble you at all!
In the morning, I learn it wasnt a sprite at all just the bread dough Florence had left near the warmth to rise, then forgotten.
Well certainly visit Harrys parents again for more of Mr. Browns stories, for warmth by the oven, and for rustic bread.
But that, as they say, is a tale for another time!
