“Not Until After the Wedding!” – She Told Her Fiancé

I had just left the gym when I noticed seven missed calls from my mum, Amanda begins. I saw her text saying, Call me back! Even though it was nearly eleven oclock, I decided to ring her. My mum is a bit of a worrier and can stay up all night fretting over all sorts of nonsense. When I spoke to her, she asked me to stop by, then broke down in tears and told me something had happenedthere might be a chance the wedding would be called off.

My sister, Emily, is only twenty-three. Shes an ambitious and successful designer. She finished university about a year ago and quickly landed a job. Emily studied design and worked part-time while finishing her degree, then got hired at the company where shed done her internship. Her personal life was almost textbook perfector at least it was until that day.

For just over a year, Emily had been seeing James. He was three years older than her, living independently, working hard, and saving up to buy his own house. On first impressions, he seemed polite and well-mannered.

Emily and James had registered their wedding date at the town hall, and there were only a few weeks left until the big day.

Someone messaged Emily out of the blue on social media, Amanda recounts. You and I havent met, but I know you well, and I think you ought to know before you get married… Emily checked the womans profileshe was around forty, so what important information could she possibly have?

Still, the stranger continued to pester Emily, messaging her from different accounts. Eventually, they arranged to meet at a café near Emilys workplace. Emily was waiting at a table when, unexpectedly, a pregnant woman walked in. At first, Emily didnt think it could be her, but she was stunned when the woman came right over.

Are you Emily? My names Helen. Ive been seeing James for over a year, and were expecting a baby boy in four months.

Naturally, my sister didnt believe her. It sounded absurdhow could it be true when she and James had been together for more than a year and with the wedding on the horizon? Helen didnt push for a confrontation or try to prove anything. She simply left, telling Emily she had her phone number, and could call if she had any questions. She also mentioned Emily could talk to her fiancé if she wanted.

So what did James have to say? Well, thats where it all unravelled. Emily had made it clear that she and James would wait until after marriage for intimacy. They went for walks, kissed, huggedthat was it. Emily had no previous experience.

James, on the other hand, was a young man already versed in relationships. He was patient but growing frustrated, and ended up seeking intimacy elsewhere without any commitment. He met Helen somewhere, but told her upfront there would be nothing serious between them and had no intention of a long-term relationship. At first, Helen was fine with thisshe had just gone through a divorce. She had a child, received decent child support and had a job. The arrangement suited her, given their age difference.

James said that when the baby arrived, hed take a paternity test and, if the child was his, would help out financially, but told Emily it was her fault for clinging to old-fashioned values. According to James, it was difficult for any young, healthy man to go without intimacy for so long, and thats what led to everything.

Now James is begging Emily not to leave him, saying he loves her and only turned to Helen for physical comfortif Emily had been more sensible, there would never have been a Helen. He repeated that, if the baby turned out to be his, hed support it financially but wouldnt be involved otherwise. Helen told him she wanted to keep the baby, and he offered to pay for the procedure, but she refused. Now its her responsibility, he said.

So, what do you think? Is James truly to blame for all this? Is it just youthful temptation taking overafter all, isnt it quite tough for a young man to endure such a dry spell? Or should Emily steer clear of a fiancé like him, and recognise that lack of intimacy is never an excuse for cheating?