З життя
Почистила дім свекрухи, але заробила лише докори
Ми прибрала у домі свекрухи, але отримала лише докори
З того часу, як ми з Дмитром почали зустрічатися, минуло вже кілька років. Наші стосуні розвивалися повільно, але впевнено. Він був турботливим, уважним, робив усе, щоб я почувалася коханою. Нещодавно він зробив пропозицію — я із радістю погодилася. Ми мріяли про спільне майбутнє, будували плани, і, здавалося, ніщо не могло піти не так.
На час підготовки до весілля його батьки поїхали у відпустку й запропонували нам пожити в їхньому домі. Дмитро відразу захопився цією ідеєю, мовляв, буде можливість побути разом, пожити як сім’я, спробувати побут на смак. Я згодилася, хоча всередині було легке хвилювання: чужий дім, батьки не близькі, і відповідальність відчувалася. Але любов сильніша за тривогу.
Спочатку все дійсно здавалося ідеальним. Я із задоволенням взялася за господарство: готувала, прала, прибирала. Дмитро рідко пропонував допомогу, вважаючи, що чоловіча справа — заробляти, а жіноча — створювати затишок. Я не сперечалася. Тим більше, він добре заробляв, і мені навіть здавалося слушним взяти побут на себе.
Все змінилося того дня, коли повернулися його батьки.
Я вичистила весь дім до блиску: вимила підлогу, вікна, витерла пил, розібрала шафи й кухню. Спекла торт, приготувала вечерю — усе, щоб вони відчули, що їх чекали із теплотою. Але замість подяки — удар по самолюбству. Дмитро, явно ніяково, повідомив, що його мати вважає мене нерозберухою.
— Виявляється, ти не помила унітуз, ванну теж не чіпала, — переказував він її слова. — А кухня — ніби після бурі. До того ж торт неїстівний.
Мене ніби обварили окропом. Я старалася з усіх сил, не шкодувала ні часу, ні енергії, хотіла показати себе гарною господаркою. А у відповідь — холод, докори й приниження. Я була впевнена: якщо й можна до чогось причепитися, то лише навмисне. Будь-яка господиня подякувала б за такий порядок, а не шукала привід для нарікань. Але свекруха, мабуть, була налаштована проти мене з самого початку.
Після цієї розмови я помітила: Дмитро став віддаленим. Він більше не говорив про весілля з тим самим запалом, не будував планів. І мене охопив страх. Невже одна думка матері може перекреслити все?
Я не розумію, що ще маю зробити, щоб мене прийняли. Може, я справді поспішила з погодженням на шлюб? Адже, якщо я не змогла здобути прихильність його матері навіть від щирого серця, що мене чекає після весілля? Докори? Нищення? Постійна боротьба за увагу та повагу сина?
І, чесно кажучи, я жалкувала, що поводилася як господиня. Зараз розумію: треба було бути просто гостією. Не лізти, не догоджати, не старавтися — просто чекати, поки вони повернуться. Тоді, можливо, не було б причин для звинувачень.
Дмитро ще раніше говорив, що хотів би, щоб ми пожили з його батьками, поки не збережемо на власну квартиру. Але після такого… Ні. Я більше не переступлю поріг цього дому. Де немає поваги — не буде й мене.
Тепер я на роздоріжжі: чи продовжувати боротьбу за цього чоловіка та його родину, жертвуючи собою, чи зупинитися й задуматися — а чи потрібен мені такий союз? Там, де тебе не поважають з самого початку, навряд чи з’являться любов і приймТепер мій вибір ясний — я повертаю собі гідність і йду.
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