З життя
The Deer Never Even Considered Asking Sergei to Move In. Dating Was One Thing, but Living Together Was a Whole Different Story.

Helen never once considered asking Stephen to move in with her. Dating was one thingliving together was entirely different. That Saturday, she waited for him as usual, expecting another pleasant stroll through the park. But when she opened the door, her breath caught in her throat. There he stood, two enormous suitcases at his feet.
Sinking into her armchair, Helen scrolled through photos on her phoneher and Stephen feeding ducks by the lake, walking hand-in-hand through Hyde Park, foraging for mushrooms in the countryside. Six months had slipped by unnoticed.
Theyd met on a dating site. She was sixty-one; he, sixty-three. Both divorced, their children grown and independent.
Stephen had charmed her instantlywell-spoken, well-read, with a dry wit. He wasnt looking for a mother for his grown kids or a housekeeper. Just companionship with someone interesting.
They met two or three times a weektheatre trips, gallery visits, cosy cafés, weekends away at her friends cottage. Helen loved the easy rhythm of itno demands, just warmth.
Tell me how you live, Helen, Stephen had asked early on, after one of their dates.
Quietly. Peacefully. Ive been on my own five yearsIm used to it.
Dont you ever get lonely?
Sometimes. But I have friends. My daughters visit. And now, theres you.
Thats nice to hear.
After his divorce, Stephen had rented a cramped flat in an ageing building. He often complainedthe landlady was difficult, refused repairs, yet hiked the rent relentlessly.
What can you do? hed sigh. No place of my own. After the split, everything went to my ex. Her parents bought that flat years ago. Try proving I paid for the renovations myself.
Ever thought of buying something?
Where would I get that kind of money?
Helen understood. She owned a spacious three-bedroom in a good part of Londonearned through decades of work. Her daughters had long moved out, leaving plenty of space.
Yet it never crossed her mind to invite Stephen to stay. Dating was one thing. Sharing a home? That was another.
That Saturday, when she opened the door to find him with those suitcases, her stomach dropped.
Stephen, whats happened?
Helencan I come in? Ill explain.
They moved inside. He left the luggage in the hall and sat heavily on the sofa.
My landladys selling the flat. Gave me a week to clear out.
And now?
Nowhere to go. Cant find another place that fastlet alone afford it.
Helen saw where this was heading.
Helen, Ive been thinkingweve been serious for six months. We know each other well. Maybe its time we tried living together?
Together? she repeated.
Yes. Youve got three bedroomsplenty of space. Im not a freeloaderIll chip in for food, bills.
Stephen, weve never even discussed this.
Why discuss it in advance? Lifes forcing our hand.
She felt a cold unease. This wasnt what shed signed up for.
I need time to think.
Whats there to think about? We love each other.
Loving someone and living with them arent the same.
Why not? At our age, we should know what we want.
Know what how?
If were seeing each other, we should be together properly.
Helen glanced at the suitcases. Hed already decided. Packed his life and presented her with a done deal.
And if I say no?
No to what? To happiness?
No to someone turning up uninvited with all their belongings.
Helen, dont be angry. I didnt mean it like that. Circumstances forced me.
Circumstances dont force people. People create them.
Whats that supposed to mean?
It means you shouldve asked me first. Not arrived with suitcases.
Stephen fell silent, weighing her words.
Fine. Lets talk now. Im askinglets live together.
And Im refusing.
Why?
Because I like my own space. I enjoy our time together, but I dont want to share a home.
But why? Were good together.
For dates, walks, weekends away. Not for daily life.
Whats the difference?
Daily life means habits, routines, compromises. Every single day.
So? We could adapt.
Thats just itI dont want to adapt. Im happy as I am.
Stephen looked wounded.
Helen, what if I proposed? Made it official?
Why?
Why? To do things properly.
Stephen, marriage wouldnt change anything. I still wouldnt want to live together.
Then whats the point of us?
The same as always. We meet, we talk, we enjoy each others company.
And then what?
Then we keep doing that.
Thats not serious!
Why not? It works for me.
But not for me. I want stability.
What kind, Helen?
The normal kind. A shared life. Breakfast together, plans for the future.
And I dont want daily breakfasts with anyone. I dont want to fit into someone elses plans.
But youre alone!
Im not. I have my daughters, my friends, and you. Theres a difference between loneliness and choosing solitude.
I dont see it.
The difference is, right now, I choose when and with whom I spend my time. Living together takes that choice away.
Helen, at sixty, we should be thinking about wholl be there in old age.
I am. And it doesnt have to be a husband.
Then who?
My daughters. A carer. Social services. There are options.
But thats not the same!
Not for you, maybe. For me, its enough.
Stephen stood, pacing the room.
So youre saying I should keep renting, and well just see each other on weekends?
Im saying live how you want. Well meet when we both feel like it.
And if I cant afford rent?
Thats your problem, not mine.
Thats cold, Helen.
Noits honest. Im not responsible for your living situation.
Were in a relationship!
Were dating. That doesnt make me accountable for your life.
Stephen sank back onto the sofa, quiet for a long moment.
If I find a flat will we keep seeing each other?
Of course. If we both want to.
And until thencould I stay here, just for a while?
No.
Not at all?
Not at all.
He understood thenshe wouldnt bend. With a slow nod, he picked up his suitcases and turned to the door.
So Ill need to find both a home and a new relationship.
Perhaps.
You wont regret this?
No.
Stephen left. He never called again. Helen returned to her quiet, solitary lifea life where, at sixty, she valued peace over companionship, and freedom above all else.
What would you have done? Let us know in the commentsand dont forget to like.
