З життя
«Ти не служниця: як чоловік змінив правила для родини — і змінив усе»
У мого чоловіка Дмитра — велика й галаслива родина. Три брати, дві сестри. Всі давно живуть окремо, зі своїми сім’ями та дітьми. Але до нас у дім завітають — завжди. Та й не просто на чай, а на справжні бенкети. Привід знайдеться завжди: день народження, свято, ювілей. І щоразу це відбувається у нас. Бо, як кажуть рідні, «у вас же зручно, хата велика, подвір’я є». Ми й справді купили просторий будинок за містом — довго працювали, відкладали. І щойно з’явилося місце з альтанкою, мангалом, галявиною та місцем для машин — вся родина вирішила, що тепер це їхня «дача».
Спочатку мені це навіть подобалось. Я виросла сама, без братів і сестер. Було приємно відчувати, що тепер я ніби частина великої родини. Ми накривали на стіл, смажили шашлики, сміялись. Але потім… потім це перетворилось на каторгу. Уявите, скільки треба приготувати, коли приїжджає більше 15 осіб? Та й ніхто навіть не питав, чи потрібна допомога. Жінки з порогу сідали в тіні з келихом вина, чоловіки йшли розпалювати мангал. А я зранку — на кухні. Шинкувала, смажила, мила, чистила. Розносила тарілки, прибирала брудні. Тільки Дмитро заглядав, провинувато посміхаючись: «Тобі допомогти?» Я, стримуючи роздратування, хитала головою: «Сама впораюсь…»
Та найобидніше було не це. А те, як я кожного разу виходила до гостей: розкуйовджена, у фартуху, без макіяжу. А вони — на всі сто. Ніби на бал, а не до заміського будинку. А мені ж теж хотілося бути іншою: вдягти гарну сукню, зачісати волосся, сісти з келихом вина. Але я не встигала. Я була обслугою.
Після таких вечорів Дмитро сам мив купу посуду, відправляв мене спати. Я бачила: він втомився. Один вихідний на тиждень, і той проходив під крики дітей і гомін бесід. А він мріяв просто полежати, замовити піцу, подивитися фільм. Та не хотів сваритись з родиною. Я теж мовчала. Аж поки одного разу не подзвонив його брат.
— Будемо святкувати мій день народження у вас, як завжди.
Дмитро, поклавши слухавку, повернувся до мене і сказа́в:
— Завтра ти прокидаєшся, вдягаєш свою найкращу сукню, робиш зачіску, якщо хочеш — макіяж. Можемо навіть щось новеньке тобі купити. Але — на кухню не заходиш. Ані ногою. Все.
— Але як же… — почала я.
— Все. Нехай привозять із собою. Ти не кухарка і не покоївка. Ми теж маємо право на відпочинок.
Я мовчки кивнула. Було дивно, але приємно.
Наступного дня приїхало повне подвір’я народу. Посмішки, коробки з тістечками, м’ясо в пакетах. А на столі — пусто. Рідні перезиралися: мовляв, де закуски, де салати, де господиня? А Дмитро спокійно вийшов і промовив:
— Тепер буде так. Хочете свята — беріть участь. Ми з дружиною втомилися. Вона не зобов’язана всіх обслуговувати. Або кожен приносить щось своє, або шукайте інше місце для гульні.
Повисла мовчанка. Всі їли, але без колишнього весе́лла. Розмови не йшли. Зате наступного разу одна із сестер — вперше за багато років! — запросила всіх до себе.
Виявляється, можуть. Коли хочуть.
Іноді треба тве́рдо стояти на своєму, щоб оточення навчилося поважати твій простір, час і сили.
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