My Husband Wants His Mother to Move In Because of Her Health, But I Can’t Cope—What Should I Do?

I have a feeling this situation is going to cause plenty of arguments among my followers. Honestly, Im even ashamed of my own thoughts. Still, I just cant help myself. When I picture what lies ahead for my family, I could almost burst into tears. I feel like Im slipping into depression. Weve been married for more than twelve years now, both working, and weve got two children.

My mother-in-law has been unwell for quite a while. She suffers from arthritis and diabetes. Shes also quite overweight, which makes it difficult for her to get around her flat. She lives alone, so daily life is a real struggle. Its hard for her to look after herself, cook meals, or keep things tidy. Every week, my wife and I do her shopping, I clean her flat, prepare her food for the week, and help her with bathing. Weve settled into these weekly visits. Of course, now and then work gets in the way, but thats not too often.

I genuinely care about my mother-in-law. She raised her son on her own, put in a great deal of hard work for him, and sacrificed her own happiness (she lost her husband at 45 and never remarried). Shes also supported us financially as a family. Thanks to her, we managed to pay off our mortgage. Theres no way I would refuse to take care of her or help her out. However, my wife recently told me that after Christmas, her mum will be moving in with us. That way, we wont have to keep going over to hers every week, and looking after her will be a lot easier, which she says will make things less stressful all round.

I do understand where my wife is coming from, but I cant help thinking about how much this will change things for us. Weve got a three-bedroom flat. My wife and I have our room, and the children each have their own. If my mother-in-law moves in, shell need one of the bedrooms. The kids will have to share, and I know there will be rows because each of them wants their own space. Im embarrassed to admit it, but I cant help seeing my mother-in-law as a burden. What would you do in my shoes? Id really like to hear your thoughts.