FIFA: The Ultimate Football Experience

Posh Girl

Look at her, all dolled up! Normal folks, they head off to work first thing in the morninglike proper people. But her? Wheres she off to in those white trousers, along our mucky streets?

She doesnt walk anywhere, thats for sure! Always driving that car of hersmight as well be a coach and horses!

Well, be thankful shes wearing anything at all! Did you see what shes got on her neck?

No. What is it?

A tattoo, thats what! Who gets those done? Looks like shes just out of prison, I swear! So young and already so marked up! What would her mother have said if she could see her now? No guidance at alllost soul, that one

The bench outside the block was abuzz, all eyes trailing after Julia as she disappeared.

And why not have a good natter, they thought, when their shopping bags already sat at their feet and there was little joy waiting for them inside? Just the same old drudgery Grown and little children, cooking, cleaning Few pleasures left, unless its some occasional party. Where is any of that joy to be found, anyway? For regular folk, happiness is a rare treat. Life becomes more about worries and wondering how to feed the kids and offer a helping hand if theres need. Perhaps bringing a biscuit for the grandchildren and finding comfort in kissing their warm, little heads. Thats all the happiness for some. Not even for everyone. Look at Mrs Griggsher lot told her not to hope for grandkids; having babies isnt trendy these days, not when there are holidays abroad and nothing to tie you down. How do they manage it, eh? Those Natashas and Julias.

And Julia used to be a decent girl, too! Ran off to school, did well, always said hello politely. Now, what? After her mother passed, she completely lost her way. Out all day, goodness knows where. Doesnt work. Not even studying, either! Mrs Evanss daughter said Julias up to no goodtattooing people, apparently! Opened her own studio, they say. How can that be right?

When Julias father reappeared a few years back, everyone thought hed set his daughter straight, teach her how things should be done. But what ended up happening? He bought her that enormous car that clogs up half the car park, then left, setting her adrift, poor thing. She was only just twentyhow could anyone abandon a girl that age alone? What if she brought home the wrong sort? And then what? Shed lose her mothers flat and that wretched car, the one thats been causing everyone so much trouble.

Oh! Off she goes! Where to? Who can say! Didnt even look back. Typical posh girl, swanning about in her white trousers.

Julia hadnt got time for her neighbours grumblings and wild guesses, even if she cared. She had enough problems of her own. Today, her schedule was so packed she could only wish there were a few extra hours in the day! Her mum always told her, Julia, youve got to learn how to manage your time.

Julia, it means everything! Some people just run about like headless chickens and get nothing done. They complain they cant manage. Envy those who do. But the real secret of success? Anyone whos on good terms with their time can get most things donemaybe even everything.

And how do you stay on good terms with time, Mum?

Dont waste it. Dont fritter it away. Decide what matters to you and give those things the time you think they deserve. But leave some time not only for work, but for rest and fun, toothats important as well. You cant just work and work. Sometimes you need to take a break and be a bit silly. If you dont, itll get to you sooner or later.

Why?

Because youre not made of iron! If you wear yourself out, what good is that to anyone? You? No. Youll just be tired, irritable, and crossjust the way itll turn out, darling. If you dont get a break, youll start suffering. And dont go thinking you only need to focus on worktheres always plenty of that. When you finish one lot, therell be more. But dont idle all the time either, or youll lose yourself. So, decide how much rest you need, and stick to it. Youll see, it helps to keep everything tidy And itll put my mind at ease too

Julia remembered her mums advice, of course, but following it was another matter. She even bought herself a planner, but that wasnt always enough. What could she do, when everything needed doing at once and nobody wanted to wait their turn? Today she had three lectures scheduled and could only make onethe rest of her day booked solid with two clients and a visit to Kates, and where theres Kate, theres always Sarah. And thats never a quick stop. She also needed to pop over to Arthurs to help him pack up not to mention all the new clientsshed not even learned their names and they were leaving next week. Would she manage it all?

The traffic jam Julia was stuck in inched forward and she pressed gently on the accelerator. The car responded right awaysoft and steady, almost as if to comfort her: Dont fret, well manage! Thats why your dad gave me to you, right? To save your precious time.

Julia stroked the steering wheel and murmured, Thank you, Dad.

A couple of years ago, if anyone had told her shed thank her father for anything, Julia wouldve burst out laughing. Shed hated her father nearly as long as she could remember.

Her mum had never said a bad word about him. On the contrary, shed tell Julia how clever he was, always saying Julia was just like him.

But Julia couldnt fathom how someone so clever could walk out on his child and vanish without a word, never once looking back.

She carried that anger and disappointment for yearsa bitterness towards the one who should have been there to love and defend her.

In nursery, Julia would sulk in a corner, watching the other girls dance with their dads at the Christmas show. She didnt have a partnerand it hurt so much she couldnt even cry. Shed keep her eyes dry, determined not to look away.

At school, she clenched her teeth and stood up for herself whenever she was picked on, envying the girls who could shout, Ill tell my dad, youll be sorry!

Right before finishing school, Julia had a total bust-up with her best friend Ann, when Ann said offhandedly, Dad says I can pick any uni. Hell pay if I dont get in myself. And if I do, hell buy me a car with the money he saves.

Julia and Ann had been best mates since they were three, but it was at that very moment she knew their friendship was over.

It wasnt jealousysomething else. More a deep, burning hurt. Ann knew all about Julia, especially about her desperate wish for a father, and for some reason never wasted a chance to twist the knife.

But truly, Julia was never the jealous type. She and her mum werent any worse off than anyone else. Theyd even holidayed abroad, and Julia had cool clothes and, for her sixteenth birthday, a proper smartphone from her mum.

That phone wasnt the most important gift that day. Just as Julia was admiring her new gadget, the one person shed yearned to meet her whole life showed up at her door.

Shed kicked up a huge fussshouting, screaming, crying Ignored her mums attempts to calm her, shoved her away, yelling, Youre a traitor! Whys he here? I dont want to see him!

Julia had no idea her mum was already holding grim medical results, that their lives would soon be stopped short on a heartbreaking precipicethen swept away in an avalanche, taking everything with it that seemed safe or familiar. Nothing would feel solid again for a long time. Just a bog of uncertainty, sucking the future out of reach, until hope faded all together, and her mum finally took Julias hand, needing her to listen.

This is my fault, Julia! Our separation, you not seeing your father Me, you understand? Blame me!

Why? Her mums fingers were icy and firm, but Julia didnt pull away, finally about to learn why shed sat waiting in the corners for all these years, wondering where her father was.

I was hurt

Hurt about what, Mum? Tell mewhat could possibly hurt enough for you to take my father from me?

Ill tell you. Just listen. Its hard for me

And Julia listened

She heard how her parents had married young, too naïve to know better. How her mum had suffered through both families reproaches while carrying Julia.

Julia wasnt planned, wasnt wanted by anyone. Shed ruined everyones plans, and both parents were blamed. Her father never finished universityhad to support the family. Her mum had taken a year out for maternity, but never returnedanother reason for finger-pointing. Resentment, grudges, and the biggest triggerJulia being a girl and not a boyso her mum left for her aunts, taking baby Julia, while her dad never even knew hed never see his daughter again.

He searched for you. Wrote, called But I told him you werent his daughter

Oh God, Mum! Why?!

It was said to me so often, I thoughtfine! If thats what everyone wants, so be it!

Who said it? Who wanted it?

Everyone Sorry, Julia It all sounds so silly now, but back then, it felt right. I didnt want anyone to say to you what theyd said to meno child should grow up in hate! I tried to protect youthe best I could. I see now it was wrong But then, it seemed the best thing

Julia finally pulled her hand free and stalked to the window, slamming her fist on the sill. Her cactusthe one Ann had given her, now toweringjumped, and Julia watched the black clumps of soil dotting the clean windowsill. Each one seemed like Mums wordsmaking a mess, and cleaning it up wouldnt be easy. That dirt would smear and need scrubbing

Julia went to get a cloth and wiped the windowsill. Then, just like in childhood, she sat by her mothers bed, dry-eyed, and demanded, Tell me everything. No more lies. Got it?

I wont

And so Julia learned how it truly was. And though she had more questions than answers, she finally saw just how strange life is. Today you know one thing, everythings clear, but tomorrow, with a scrap of new information, your tidy little world fractures. And then, what do you do? No one can tell youyou have to decide for yourself.

Julia never truly knew if shed forgiven her mother. Probably, she thought, though she wasnt certain.

One thing Julia knew for sure: she was grateful her mother had finally told her the truth. Or part of it. She knew the most important things were left behind the closed door of her mums bedroom in the quiet of night, in her fathers hands holding her mums thin wrists when the painkillers wore off, in those rare tears Julia glimpsedthough he tried to hide them.

Julia never asked her dad about what was said in those moments. She didnt want to reopen wounds.

Besides, she hadnt got the time. They had to learn to live together now, since her father downright refused to leave her with her aunt.

Ill go when you tell me, but only after you turn eighteen. Until then, Ill try to keep out of your way.

No chance! Youve been out of my way for long enough! I want you in my life, Dad

Natalie, Julias mum, lasted nearly two years instead of the few months the doctors gave her. Despite that final stretch being the hardest of their lives, Julia could saythose were the happiest, and the saddest, years. It made her all the angrier at time itself, so heartless and strict, for measuring out so little on their behalf

Thats when Julia began to draw.

Why hadnt she started earlier? She didnt know herself. Shed scribbled occasionally in old sketchbooks, doodled in the margins at school, but had never thought seriously about art.

Hey, this is rather good, her father said with a whistle when he happened to catch sight of her sketching one day.

Look at this! He pulled off his t-shirt and Julia gasped. Across her fathers back was a colourful tattoo, so beautiful her scribbles seemed like childish wall drawings.

My mate did it. Want me to ask him to take a look at your drawings? Maybe he could teach you.

Yes! Please!

No one in the flats even noticed when Julia left for London, moving in with her dad for a year to learn the tattoo trade. Then, she wanted to go home.

I want to go back, Dad

Strangely, her father understood. He didnt try to dissuade her, just asked for a couple of weeks extra, then vanished for a while. When he returned, having helped her pack, he put the car keys on her new kitchen counter.

This is yours now. And this too.

He placed a folder with papers downand Julia raised an eyebrow at him.

Whats all this?

Its your own studio, love. I sold my flat and bought you a place in the centre. Not huge, but you dont need a palace, do you? Alex, your teacher, helped pick the equipmentdeliveries are all set. Work hard, study hard. Its a trade, but youll want qualifications, too. Secondary schools not enough, you see?

Julia could hardly believe it. Even after shed set up shop, showed off her first tattoo to the biker neighbour Colin (whose wife nearly fainted at his new ink), she couldnt quite accept that things might finally be looking up.

Her dad oversaw setting up, kept an eye on renovations, and arranged some top-notch studio adverts, before packing his things again.

Wherere you off to now?

My parents. Its a bit complicated, and Im needed there. You know that, right?

I know But Dad, I dont want you going.

I know, sweetheart, butits necessary.

When her father left, Julia threw herself into work and study. Clients flocked around, so much so that she hired two assistants right away just to keep up.

It was at the peak of this whirlwind that Julia met Kate.

A smartly-dressed young woman entered the studio one evening, as Julia, waiting for a late client, grew increasingly agitated by the minute.

Excuse mecan I speak to the artist?

Julia looked up from her laptop and lecture notes. Thats me.

Now dont be silly, girl, I said I want to talk to the expert here. Will you fetch them?

Julia sized up the womanshe didnt look as well as shed at first seemed: yes, the clothes were expensive and the haircut decent, but there was no makeup, puffy eyes, ragged nails, and a look of sorrow. Sorrow, Julia knew well. She calmly found one of her own portfolios.

Here. My work. If you like it, tell me what you want.

A name Here, on my wrist So I can see it all the time

That was itthe end of the womans composure. Julia saw her bite her lip, blink away tears, and barely hold it together. Julia quietly locked the dooras the late client parked outside.

Sit down, Julia called while pulling the blinds. Well do it.

Will it hurt? I know it will, was the womans last word, settling into the chair.

Sarah, she whispered.

Julia didnt ask any questions. She learned about Sarah two days later, when she bumped into the same woman at the hospital, where shed gone to visit her aunt.

Ohits you.

Yes, thank you

No trouble. I like it. It turned out beautiful.

It did Sarah thinks so, too.

Hes?

She. My daughter.

The woman held out her hand, oddly formal. Kate.

Julia.

Would you like to meet Sarah?

Absolutely! Julia didnt hesitatenot knowing what a shift it would bring to her life.

A little girl in odd glasses, one spectacle taped together, stole Julias heart immediately. Without a trace of shyness, the girl grabbed Julias hand and marched her along, pointing at the sky.

Got any nuts? Seeds? Nothing at all? What are you going to feed the squirrels with, then?

The what?

Squirrels, with tails! There are loads of them in the park. We come and find them every day! Mum says Ive given them so many nuts soon theyll fall out of the trees from getting fat!

They wont. They jump around so much theyll never get fat.

Really? The girl eyed Julia, then giggled. Youre clever!

Not that clever, actually.

Why not?

Still learning, arent I?

Oh, right. Oh, hang on, I forgot!

The little girl solemnly offered Julia her hand. Sarah Kate Thompson.

Lovely Julia gently shook her tiny hand, careful not to disturb the taped-up specs. Julia Ann Walker.

Now were friends!

Childrens laughter tinkled under the pines of the hospital park, and Julia saw Kates weary face brighten, if only for an instant.

Next time Julia visited, her pockets were stuffed with nuts.

It took a while for Kate to share why Sarah was in hospital. Their new friendship was like walking carefully on thin iceeach step tentative, gentle, building trust.

Is there anything that can be done?

There is. Its not a lost cause anymore. Kate wrapped her hands round a tea-mug in the cafe near the studio. When I first came to you, they said there was little hope.

I see

But then a new surgeon arrivedArthur. He said it wasnt the end

So why are you crying, then, Kate? Thats good news!

Yesterday, Sarah had her operation. Shes in intensive care. They threw me outtold me to come back tomorrow. Im frightened, Julia. More than Ive ever been. And Ive no one else to share it with.

Youre on your own? Wheres Sarahs dad?

He left before she was born. Im no saint myself, Julia. Had Sarah for me, picked someone I thought would make a good father but I didnt love him. He knew it when I got pregnant. So hes not in our livesyou see?

Not really, but none of that matters. Whats past is past. Youve got Sarah.

Shes everything.

Thats right! And youve no right to give up. Hear me? Julias voice rose. Look at your wristcan you see the name? I picked those colours to stand out. You mustntno, you absolutely cannotlet your daughters name become just a memory, got it?

Please dont shout I hear you

If you do, then enough with the self-pity. Get back in there and fight!

Kate sobbed, face buried in her hands. Julia, sensing this was a turning point, let her cry in peace, scaring off any waiters who dared approach their table.

Some water, please.

They spent that evening and night in Julias studiotalking, laughing, crying, and in silence. In the morning, Julia bundled her friend into the car and drove her to the hospital.

Ill go in with you.

Have you got time?

Kate, really Julia sighed, rummaged in her rucksack, and handed Kate a comb. Here. Brush your hair so you dont scare the poor child!

Everything turned out all right for Sarah, in the end. Arthurs hands did wonders.

When can I see the squirrels again? Sarah grumbled from her hospital bed.

Soon! Once youre discharged, well go to London with Julia. Therere so many squirrels over there!

Why?

What do you mean?

Why are we going to London?

Because its needed, sweetheart. Youve had your operation, but now your eyes need retraining. Thats easier to do in London. Uncle Alex, Julias friend, has already sorted everything for you.

Re-training? Dont say itIll ask Julia later!

Sarah lost interest in her mothers explanationswhat mattered was that theyd be going on a proper adventure with Julia, which had to be better than the dreary hospital and the rainy trees out the window, where not even a squirrel could be seen.

Mum?

Yes?

Is Arthur coming with us?

No, hes got too much work. And Sarah, I told you, you shouldnt call grown-ups by their first names!

But I can!

Whys that?

Because he loves Julia! Sarah laughed as Kates mouth fell open in surprise.

Cheeky! What made you say that?!

Isnt it obvious? Mum, youre so slow! And Julia too! I tell her and she doesnt believe me! Sarah shook her head in a grown-up way, and Kate marvelled, once again, at how much children really see.

There was no hiding Arthurs fondness for Julia. Yet neither of them would admit it, even to themselvesalways polite, chatting lightly about the weather, or Sarahs health, never daring take the first step.

Even after Kate and Sarah had gone to London, the two kept in touch. Julia realised she wanted to do the same not just for Sarah, but for other children as well. Alex encouraged her, offering help, and soon, Arthur was seeing off all sorts of young patients as Julia ferried them in her car on adventuresalmost never by train. Her car became a mobile homenappies, toys, even a tablet for films on long trips.

Arthur, not daring to ask why she did all of this, quietly admired Julia. But neither said a word about their feelings. That first step was never taken.

Who knows if it would ever have happened, if not for Sarah, who, coming home after her rehab, insisted to her mum that they pop into the hospital.

Why, Sarah?

I want to tell Arthur something.

What?!

Honestly, Mum, you dont get it! I want to tell him!

What about me?

Youlater!

Arthur listened to Sarah with full seriousness.

All right. Lets chat.

Kate watched as her daughter chatted and signed and guessed what had her so animated. The truth was simple.

Why havent you told her?

Told whom, what, Sarah?

Julia. That you like her.

Its complicated

Whats complicated? You adults are weird! She likes you too!

Id noticed.

Then why are you quiet?

Sarah, its I havent got much. I rent a tiny room by the hospital, and itll be a long while before I can get my own place. And Julia she has it all sorted. Ive seen her car.

So?

Well, a man ought to offer his girlfriend something, dont you see?

Isnt love enough? Sarah studied Arthur. Isnt it?

Sometimes it isnt

Sarah didnt let him finish. She tugged at his lab coat, whispered something in his ear that made him laugh, and wagged his finger at her.

Dont be cheeky!

Well, what else am I supposed to call you?! Right, Im off!

Grabbing her mums hand, she headed for the exit.

Lets go!

Where?

To Julias!

Sarah! Shes working!

Shell be happy to see me!

Kate could only laugh and order a cab.

Sarah had a talk with Julia tooand the results showed soon enough.

As Julia locked up the studio one night, she felt resolute. If a little girl could see what she herself tried to deny, maybe it was time to stop wasting precious moments?

Julia didnt notice Arthur right away. His lanky, familiar silhouette strode towards her, and the simple Hello, sounded like music.

A few months later, the bench outside Julias flats buzzed more than ever.

Shes got herself a bloke! Who is he, I wonder? Turns up with boxes, but who knows anything about him? Theres no telling with these men! The poor girls all alonehell trick her!

He seems all right!

Oh, Mrs Griggs, what do you know? Yours look decent, but you said yourself theyre up to God-knows-what! Someone should ring Julias dadlet him come sort this fellow out.

Hes already here!

No, really? When did he arrive?

Seen him the other day. I say, somethings up!

And what?

Wait and see!

And see they did.

They saw Julia in white, in a dress so lovely even Mrs Griggs gasped, the whole bench catching sight of the tattoo on her back.

They saw Arthur, leading his bride, wagging his finger at giggling Sarahwhod just sold Julia to Arthur and was beaming with pride.

They saw Kate, weeping nonstop, fussing with Julias veil and shooing off concerned questions.

Let me have a good cry for once, will you! These are happy tears

And the odd people who appeared by Julias block, bearing flowers and hugging the new bride as if she was family.

And no one ever figured out who those people were.

Or why Julia, before climbing into the car, hoisted up her dress, kicked off her heels and asked for trainers, declaring, No bride can drive in those silly shoes.

Or why Arthur then swept her up, settled her in the car, and tied her trainers himselfthe very ones Kate fetched from the boot, just in case.

Nothings ever normal with her, the benchfolk grumbled as the cars drove off behind clouds of autumn leaves.

Wellshe is a posh girl, after all!

And everyone knewit was true. But perhaps being a little bit different is what makes life sparkle. In the end, happiness comes not from fitting in, but from daring to live, forgive, and love, right in the face of other peoples muttering and your own doubts. Life, after all, is too short to waste on regrets.