Next Door Neighbours: Unveiling the Lives Around Us

Listen, Victor, spat Nigel, leaning against his neighbours garden wall, youve taken her as a wife, and she cant cook a proper roast nor even sort the laundry correctly. He stared mournfully at his modest cottage, the place where his young wife used to sleep.

Nigel, fiddling with a wrench on his motorbike, chuckled.

Come on, Vic, the wedding was just yesterday. Give your missus a bit of time to recover from the whole spectacle.

What? Im not interested in the wedding talk. She wore me out that day.

Wore you out? How so? Nigel asked, genuinely curious.

Victor spat out a sunflower seed hull and frowned.

Right from the start she started playing games. When I arrived at her house with the dowry, the whole yard was a mess. She riddled me with nonsense riddles, forced me to dance a gypsy jig, and my new trousers ripped from the strain. My old man gave me those pants, and I married her anyway. By the time I made it to her bedroom Id gone through a dozen circles of hell, only to find shed bolted out the window and fled. The whole village searched for half a day, finally finding her laughing and saying shed changed her mind. When I trampled her bouquet she burst into tears, swore I didnt get her humor, and that the whole ceremony was a farce. At the reception she wouldnt let me touch her, fearing Id dirty her dress. Youve been eating fried fish, Vic, with filthy fingers, she snapped. My dress is expensive; its not a napkin for you. So stop whining about the wedding, Colin.

Nigel set his wrench down, scratched his head under his flat cap and said, Well, Vic, keep quiet about it. You know my sister, Kate, shes never caused such a kerfuffle.

Exactly! All women are fine, but I got a real piece of work. I get up, do the chores, and she just lies in bed! She could at least boil the kettle.

Does she want to work?

Nigel was surprised. She refuses to look for a job. Says she needs a break after school. Her mother and aunt slip her money for trinkets and hairpins, otherwise shed scream at me all day.

Nigel sighed, stared at Victor and said, Youve landed yourself in a rotten spot, mate. Youve married a lazy miss. Send her packing until she bears a child, or at least try to

Victor retorted, How was I supposed to know the Chesters raised a lazy girl? They kept bragging about their darling Lily being a golden goose. Turns out it was a con. Now theyre off prancing about, as if theyd dropped her like ballast, leaving me duped.

The village was a picturepostcard: a meandering river, cricket chirps in the grass, occasional moo of a cow, a dogs bark, and a roosters crow. Tractors and motorbikes rattled along the dusty lane, metal buckets clanged.

Colin! shouted Kate from their cottage, flinging the kitchen window open. Dinners ready, come in.

Victor turned lazily toward his own wife, Nicole, and slumped by his bike, listening to the muffled sounds drifting from the newlyweds house next door.

Vic, could you peel the potatoes? Ill fetch the onions, cooed Lily, as sweet as a kitten.

Why am I stuck peeling? That’s a womans job, Victor muttered to Nigel, who was still tinkering with his bike. Im already chopping the chicken.

Ha, Nigel chuckled, theyre just simmering the stew, while my own soup is already on the stove!

Lilys voice floated in, Im busy, love, fixing my hair rollers.

Patience, Lily! Victor called back, Im trying to look dashing for you.

Lily giggled, I want to be pretty, not a dull drudge. When I curl my hair like this I feel like a young Sophia Loren. Trust me, Ive got videos and everything.

Nicole, standing by the stove, glared at Victor. Whats the answer, then?

She tossed her head, stormed out, and slipped into a sleek dress, powdering on lipstick. A few moments later she returned, solemn, stripped the dress, slipped into a housecoat, and washed her face clean. She gathered her hair into a bun and perched on the sofa where Victor was dozing.

Victor, she said, are you complaining about me to the neighbours?

Yes? he whispered.

Youve been listening to everyone elses gossip. If youre unhappy, say it! Stop moaning about my habits.

She burst into tears, her cheeks damp. From that day she stopped admiring herself in the mirror, began scrubbing the floors, baking pies, and visiting the neighbours houses in a sullen mood. Her smile vanished, the laughter stopped, and the music in Victors home fell silent.

One morning Victor woke up to find the bed empty, a note pinned to the door:

Victor, Ive decided Im a terrible wife. Youre always complaining to the neighbours, its too much. Im leaving. Dont look for me youll never find me. Goodbye.

What the hell? Victor shouted, Lucy! My Lucy!

Nigel rushed over, trying to console his friend. She ran off, huh? Let her go. The countryside isnt for her; shell probably head to the city where lifes livelier. I told you shed be a bad wife, didnt I? Dont worry, Vic, well find you a proper, hardworking partner.

At that moment Kates sister, little Mae, appeared with a tray of pots, shouting, Maes here to help, Victor! Well sort this out.

Nigel peered out the window at the neighbours house and muttered, Whys no one staying home? Ive got no one to go fishing with.

Kate, from the kitchen, complained, Whats all this shouting about, Kate?

Lately, the household atmosphere had turned sour. Kate, having watched her neighbour Lucy run off, had started to change as well, and Nigel noticed.

Kate, whats this about? he asked, irritated. Youve dumped all the chores onto me. I cant breathe, let alone sit down.

Kate snapped back, Am I not a person in your eyes? Im not just a workhorse! I want perfume, makeup, a glimpse of myself in the mirror, a shopping trip to the town, maybe a new dress

Nigel finally understood. Ah, so its Lucys influence again.

Kate sighed, Its not Lucys fault. Ive stopped seeing a life with you, Colin. Im stuck at the stove, tending the animals. When was the last time I danced? Only at the school prom with you. Oh, Colin

Victor returned to the village, hammer in hand, busy nailing windows and doors. Nigel heard the hammers thud and rushed over.

What are you doing, Vic? he asked, eyes wide.

Im moving, neighbour, Victor announced.

Where to? Nigel asked, stunned.

Im heading to the town centre. Theyve got a club, a café, somewhere to take a wife.

What wife? Lucy ran off.

Ive found her, Victor grinned, She landed a job in the town centre, rented a flat. Im going to join her.

Nigels jaw dropped. Youve gone mad, Vic! Trusting a flighty lass? You married yourself into trouble, you know that, right? Youll come back without a stitch, without a wife! Dont be daft, listen to me. Forget this nonsense and take my sister, Mae. Shell make borscht, bake pies, wash shirts

Victor laughed, shaking his head. Happiness isnt in pies, Nigel. Its in love. If were surviving on semiready meals, at least she, my beautiful Lucy, will be by my side! I was wrong before, but not now.

Nigel kept shouting, trying to pull his friend back, but Victor just laughed and walked away.

Stupid fool, Nigel muttered, married a daft woman and became one himself. Two shoes, one pair

Nigel trudged home, sighing, only to find Kate sitting on the doorstep, clutching a suitcase.

What are you doing here? he asked, bewildered.

Its over, Colin. Im leaving you. She sobbed, I cant see a future with you. Im heading to the town centre to find work! Im tired of toiling for you! Maybe Ill be like Lucy free

She wailed, and Nigel gently lifted the suitcase, hugging her trembling form.

Okay, Kate youd have said it, you know. I should have listened. He sighed, If only Id heard you sooner.

The old stereotypes in Nigels mind began to crack, but the village carried on, with its river humming, crickets chirping, and the occasional roar of a tractor on the dusty road.