З життя
Вчора таксі привезло водія, що вразив мене до глибини душі.
Вчора викликала таксі, і мене вразив водій, який приїхав. Вразив настільки, що другий день не можу про нього не розповідати:
Сідаю в авто. Водій посміхається, а я в телефоні, вирішую робочі питання.
– Вам не дме?
– Ні, дякую, все добре.
– Ви не змерзли?
– Ні, мені справді комфортно.
– Хочете цукерок? Я тільки-но купив у магазині. Такі смачні! Обожнюю їх! Зазвичай не пропоную пасажирам, це не завжди доречно. Але вам захотілось. Зрозумію, якщо відмовитеся. Хочете?
– Хочу!
Віддав мені цілу коробку. Пожартувала, що розумію, чому у нього такий високий рейтинг. Зупиняємося на світлофорі, поруч проходять хлопці з квітами.
– Любите квіти?
– Люблю.
Зупиняє хлопців, купує мені квіти. Очі на лоба лізуть. Їду, усміхаюся… приємно… Намагалася зрозуміти, що відбувається – ранок, ще сонна.
Почали говорити про дітей. У нього дочка на другому курсі університету в Польщі. І коли він сказав наступне, моя щелепа відвисла.
«Знаєте, Олеся. Я так радію, що у мене є дитина. Дружина. Робота. Мені це реально подобається. Дочка дзвонить, просить грошей на якісь речі. Ну, вона ж у Польщі. Сумує. А я поповнюю їй картку, і так на душі легко. Просто радість! Що я для своєї дитини зробив щось приємне. Уявляю, як вона там якісь хусточки купе, піцу з друзями замовить, їй на все вистачить. І мені від цього тепло.
А ще знаєте, коли я відвожу дружину на манікюр (на хвилинку, так?), я сам оплачую. І так радію! Вона ж потім цей манікюр мені ще два тижні показуватиме і усміхатиметься. І мені від цього так добре, ви собі не уявляєте. Я ж для сім’ї щось хороше зробив! І мені від цього так на душі добре.»
На цьому етапі я вже забула про всі вхідні на своєму телефоні.
«А знаєте, так мало щасливих людей на вулицях! Дивлюсь на пішоходів, і майже не бачу “своїх”, усміхнених. Усі такі похмурі та напружені. Ви взагалі перша, хто усміхнулась мені за останні кілька днів з пасажирів.
Нещодавно зустрів знайомих. А у них двоє дітей – у першому класі та в третьому. І вони скаржилися, як дорого дитину до школи зібрати, а речі купити, підручники, форму, курси…»
Розповідали хвилин п’ятнадцять, а на них обличчя не було.
А я запропонував рішення. Знаєте яке?
Сказав – йдіть у найближчий дитячий будинок і здайте туди своїх дітей, якщо вони для вас проблема. І у вас не буде проблем ні зі школою, ні з формою, ні з підручниками. Вони у відповідь – “ні, ну як це… так не можна… ми ж їх любимо, це ж наші діти…”
Ну ось ваші діти – значить, будьте вдячні за те, що Бог дав вам здорових, живих красивих дітей. Багато людей мріють про це і на всі гроші світу готові, а у вас цей дар вже є. Подарунок долі. Любіть їх – робіть все для них. І робіть так, щоб вони про це “все” навіть не дізнались. Не любите – здайте в дитбудинок.
Що ви скаржитесь?
Настільки щасливі люди, а зовсім не помічають свого щастя. І в більшості так, правда?…»
Він ще про щось розказував далі. Я мовчала, слухала (це рідко буває), і моєю головою проносились фрази «оплачую манікюр дружині й радію», «роблю щось для дитини й радію».
Зрозуміла, що цей Водій не підприємець, не інвестор, не політик. Він не входить у жодні ТОП 100 чоловіків, як багато моїх знайомих. Його немає на обкладинках. З ним не беруть інтерв’ю. Він навіть не заробляє, як я.
Але в його житті більше, ніж у всіх інших! Любові, світла – справжнього світла, не телевізійного! – більше, ніж у всіх людей, яких я коли-небудь зустрічала. Взагалі.
Я дивилася на чоловіків зі свого оточення і думала, що це нормально. Бути вічно з кислим обличчям (ти ж у великому бізнесі), або не усміхатись, бути вічно зайнятим і незадоволеним, не вміти радіти, або говорити жінкам «ооо, знову на свої салони гроші висмоктуєш з мене», або ставитись до життя, як до боротьби та випробування.
Вийшла з машини з квітами, цукерками та супроводжена 100500 компліментами. Цікаво, він так масштабує свій світло на всіх людей? Вийшла і зрозуміла, що мені світло!!! Такий великий урок. І таке космічне ставлення до життя.
Я таких інсайтів і прояснень після тренінгів ніколи не отримувала.
Вчителі поряд!
You Don’t Deserve It — “After my divorce, I thought I’d never trust anyone again,” Andrew admitted, fidgeting with his empty espresso cup. His voice cracked and wavered so convincingly that Kate found herself leaning closer. “You know, when someone betrays you, you lose a part of yourself. She left me with wounds I thought would never heal… I honestly didn’t think I’d survive.” Andrew’s stories poured out for a long time: about his wife who never appreciated him, the pain that wouldn’t let go, the fear of starting over. Each word settled in Kate’s heart like a warm little stone. She imagined herself as the woman who could restore his faith in love—how they’d heal his scars together, how he’d realize true happiness was possible with her by his side. He first mentioned Max on their second date, casually dropped in between dessert and coffee… — “I have a son, by the way. He’s seven. Lives with his mum, but stays with me every weekend. The court said so.” — “That’s wonderful!” Kate beamed. “Children are a blessing.” She started daydreaming: Saturday morning breakfasts for three, trips to the park, TV evenings together. The boy needed a woman’s care, a mother’s warmth. She could become a second mum—not a replacement, but someone close, someone family… — “Are you sure you don’t mind?” Andrew watched her with a crooked smile she mistook for wariness at the time. “A lot of women run when they hear about a kid.” — “I’m not most women,” she said proudly. Her first weekend with Max was a celebration. Kate made blueberry pancakes—his absolute favourite, as Andrew had tipped her off. Patiently, she helped him through his maths homework. She washed his dinosaur T-shirt, pressed his school uniform, made sure he was in bed by nine sharp. — “You should have a rest,” she told Andrew after he’d sprawled out on the sofa with the remote. “I’ve got this covered.” Andrew nodded—or so it seemed then, gratefully. But now she realized it was the nod of a man taking his due. Time marched on. Kate worked as a logistics manager, out by eight, home after seven. Decent salary by London standards—enough for two. But there were three. — “Hold-up on site again,” Andrew would say as if announcing a hurricane, “Client’s pulled out. But there’s a big contract coming, I promise.” The “big contract” hovered on the horizon for a year and a half, sometimes getting closer, mostly never arriving. But the bills always came—rent, utilities, internet, groceries, child support for Marina, new trainers for Max, school contributions. Kate paid all of them, quietly. She skimped on lunches, brought in tupperware pasta, walked home in the rain to save on cabs. She hadn’t had a manicure in a year—did her own nails and tried not to remember the luxury of professional treatments. Three years, and Andrew had given her flowers exactly three times. Kate remembered each bouquet—cheap roses from the convenience kiosk near their tube stop, droopy and with snapped-off thorns. Probably on special offer… The first was an apology after Andrew called her hysterical in front of Max. The second came after an argument about a friend who visited unannounced. The third, when he missed her birthday because he lingered with mates—simply forgot. — “Andrew, I don’t want expensive gifts,” she tried to keep her voice gentle. “Just… sometimes I’d like to know you’re thinking of me. Even a card…” His face contorted instantly. — “So it’s all about money for you, is it? Presents? Don’t you care about love? Or what I’ve been through?” — “That’s not what—” — “You don’t deserve it.” Andrew spat the words at her like dirt. “After all I do for you, you still complain.” She fell silent. She always did—it made things easier. Easier to live, to breathe, to pretend everything was fine. Yet, for mates’ nights, Andrew always found cash. Pubs, football at the local, café Thursdays. He’d come home tipsy, reeking of sweat and cigarettes, flop onto the bed without noticing Kate was still awake. She convinced herself this was how love worked. Love meant sacrifice. Love meant patience. He would change, surely. She just had to be even more attentive, love even harder—after all, look at what he’d suffered… Talk of marriage became a minefield. — “We’re happy as we are, why do we need a piece of paper?” Andrew waved the question away like a pesky fly. “After what happened with Marina, I need time.” — “It’s been three years, Andrew. That’s a long time.” — “Now you’re pressuring me—always pressuring!” He stormed off, ending the conversation. Kate longed for children of her own. She was twenty-eight, the ticking biological clock growing louder each month. But Andrew wasn’t interested in a second round of fatherhood—he had a son, and that was enough for him. Then came that Saturday—she asked for just one day. One day. — “The girls are inviting me over. We haven’t seen each other in ages. I’ll be back by evening.” Andrew looked at her as though she’d announced she was emigrating. — “And Max?” — “He’s your son, Andrew. Spend the day with him.” — “So you’re abandoning us? On a Saturday? When I’m expecting to relax?” She blinked. In three years she’d never left them alone. Never asked for a day to herself. She cooked, cleaned, tutored homework, washed, ironed—while holding a full-time job. — “I just want to see my friends. It’s only a few hours… And he’s your son. Can’t you spend a day with him on your own?” — “You’re supposed to love my child as much as me!” Andrew suddenly roared. “You live in my flat, eat my food, and now you’ve got the nerve to make demands?!” His flat. His food. Kate paid the rent. Kate bought the food. Three years supporting a man who yelled at her for wanting to spend a day with her friends. She looked at Andrew—twisted face, throbbing temples, fists clenched—and saw him for the first time. Not as a wounded soul, not a helpless victim in need of rescue, but an adult who had learned to expertly exploit kindness. Kate, to him, was not a beloved partner, not a future wife. She was a walking wallet and a live-in maid. That was all. When Andrew left to drop Max back to Marina, Kate took out her suitcase. Her hands moved calmly, no shakes, no doubts. Passport. Mobile. Charger. A couple of shirts and jeans. The rest could be bought later. The rest didn’t matter. She left no note. What could she explain to a man who never valued her? The door closed behind her quietly, no fuss, no drama. The calls started within an hour—one, then another, then a barrage—a shrill, endless trill that made her phone quiver. — “Kate, where are you?! What’s going on?! You’ve gone, there’s no dinner! Am I supposed to go hungry now? What the hell?!” She listened—his voice angry, demanding, full of righteous indignation—and marvelled. Even now, as she’d left, Andrew thought only of himself. How inconvenient this was. Who would make his tea? No “sorry”. No “what happened”. Just “how dare you”. Kate blocked his number. Blocked him on Messenger. On every social platform—brick by brick, she built herself a wall. Three years. Three years with someone who never loved her. Who used her empathy as a disposable resource. Who convinced her that self-sacrifice was love. But that’s not love. Love doesn’t humiliate. Love doesn’t reduce someone to a servant. Kate walked through the twilight streets of London and for the first time in ages, she could breathe. She vowed she’d never again confuse love with self-neglect. Never again give herself away to those who prey on pity. And always, always choose herself. Just herself.
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