З життя
While My Daughter and Grandchildren Squeeze Into a Tiny Flat, My Son-in-Law’s Parents Enjoy a Spacio…
As the dusk settled over London, my living room felt colder than usual, despite the radiator humming against the chill. My daughter has been married for eight years now, yet luck has never been on our side when it comes to her husband and his family. We give our all to our children, but his side… well, they’ve given nothing. Not once.
When the issue of their housing came up, his parents washed their hands of it entirely “It’s nothing to do with us,” they’d said. In the end, my husband and I had no choice but to move out of our own lovely flat in Clapham, just so we could scrape together enough for a place for the young couple. It broke my heart we loved that flat. Solid brick, always warm, filled with memories. But what could we do? Our children needed a home to call their own. So we renovated, furnished it top to bottom, all without a penny from his parents.
Now, I help with my grandchildren as well. My daughter is on maternity leave with the little one, and the eldest has just started at the local primary school. Theres simply no way she could manage all by herself it’s barely possible to rouse one child, get them dressed, and rush out the door, let alone with a newborn! So her father and I take turns doing the school run, both of us fully involved in raising our grandchildren.
Meanwhile, my son-in-laws parents act as if none of this concerns them. I watch their indifference and cant help but wonder: how can grandparents choose to stand so far apart from their own family?
Its always been like this. Imagine not giving your own son a single pound towards his wedding. Before they married, I called his parents and suggested we meet to discuss the arrangements, but their answer was, “What if they split up in a month? These days, 70% of couples divorce within six months, thats just the statistics.”
So in the end, my husband and I paid for everything organised the wedding, gifted them a small flat while his family turned up like distant acquaintances, handing over a miserable £100 in an envelope. And still, my son-in-law keeps demanding more.
Its been eight years since we bought them that flat well, a studio really. More than enough for two. But now with two children, of course its cramped. I feel my son-in-law ought to show more initiative. I tell him, “If you cant earn more, cant your parents chip in a little?”
But he outright refuses: “I cant ask them for help!”
I offered, Shall I bring it up myself, if youre not comfortable? He wouldnt even let me mention it. For years hes had no issue with taking from us, but his own parents? Thats somehow out of bounds. For eight years, hes relied on our generosity. Why not stand on his own two feet? People find a way to buy their own homes. I tell him youre young, there are opportunities out there, pick up a second job, try working abroad if need be.
But this is the same attitude he shows my daughter. Now she calls me in tears, asking why I interfere so much. He says, In-laws cant be changed, theyre just not the helping sort.
And Im furious: his parents live comfortably, always off on spa weekends, but heaven forbid you ask them for help. My son-in-law seems to actually forbid it. What a dutiful son! But not a trace of compassion for his own mother and father-in-law.
Sometimes I stare out at the city lights and wonder how some people can live with such cold hearts, while others give until theres nothing left.
