Yes, the flat may be small, but we will still buy your cousin a bed.

Honestly, anyone who works full-time will totally get this feeling: that moment when the doorbell goes off on your one precious day off and your heart just sinks.

Before Id even properly woken up, I dont know why, but my first thought was that maybe something had gone wrong with the plumbing. So I scrambled out of bed to check if Id managed to flood anyone downstairs. Thankfully, the bathroom and kitchen were bone dryno sign of trouble, unlike the mini disaster I caused downstairs about six months ago.

But the doorbell just kept ringing relentlessly. So, half-awake and feeling like a zombie, I went to the door. As soon as I opened it, I spotted a pile of suitcases and a handful of people behind them.

Id never have recognised you walking down the street! chirped an older woman, giving me one of those strange compliments English aunties seem to specialise in.

Im racking my brain trying to figure out who she is…

Then I spot the young bloke standing with her, grinning ear to ear and holding out his hand, looking ever so pleased with himself. And just peeking out from behind their shoulders is the head of another lad, mercifully saying nothing to add to my confusion. But the woman pipes up again, Well, are you just going to leave us standing on the doorstep? Come on, let us in!

Sorry, come in? Pardon?

Oh, dont you recognise your uncle? she says, gesturing grandly towards the young man. I looked after you, you know! And thats his sonyour cousin! Hes come to study here in Birmingham and hasnt anywhere to stay, so we thought he could move in with you for a while. Well sort out a proper bed and everything later. Weve brought you some treats too! Hasnt your dad rung you about this?

Erm, no, he hasnt

Typical! That man! Never mind, well muddle through. No big deal! she laughs.

What do you mean muddle through? Are they actually supposed to live here?

Well, yes, of course! Youll look after him while he gets settledyou know what its like for students new to a big city, she gushes.

Im sorry, but I really cantespecially since my fiancé is round all the time. There just isnt space here.

Oh, well make do somehow…

No, honestly, somehow isnt really an answer. There are halls of residence for studentseveryone goes through it. I did myself.

No, no, that’s just not possible!

The whole mood changed, as their smiles faded and they started trying to haul their suitcases past me into the flat. I quickly realised that if those bags crossed my threshold, Id never get rid of them. So I asked them to wait five minutes, then promptly marched them (and their luggage) to the student accommodation where my cousin had already been accepted.

Of course, all I got in return were mutterings about how selfish and cold-hearted I was. They stormed off, scowling, bags in tow. Once I got back, I rang Mum and Dad to ask, What on earth is going on?

Mum was fuming, and she ended up accusing me of not caring enough about family, saying, Youre not exactly a team player, are you?

Honestly, only in my family would setting boundaries spark international-level drama!