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The Day I Realised Something Was Wrong: My Wife No Longer Says “I Love You” — Reflections of a 34-Ye…

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I realised something was wrong the day I noticed my wife no longer said I love you to me. I cant quite pinpoint when it stopped. Was it last week? Last month? Or even earlier? All I know is, she used to say it all the timewhen I left for work in the morning, as we hung up the phone, before we fell asleep. And my replies were always half-hearted: me too, same here, haha, love.

Im thirty-four. Every day is a long slog at work. I head out early from our home in Manchester and return late, tired and spent. Id always believed being a good husband meant ticking off the boxespay the bills in pounds, do the weekly shop, be home, stay loyal. My routine was wash, eat, scroll through my phone or switch on the telly. Shed share stories from her day, and Id answer with monosyllables: yeah, okay, well talk later, Im tired. Her I love you became background noise, something ordinary. I never imagined Id miss hearing it.

Subtle changes crept in. She no longer messaged me during the day. Once, she would text: take care, have a great day, had lunch? Now, nothing. In the evenings, shed climb into bed, phone in hand, her back to me. No more reaching for my hand. No more asking how Im feeling. One night, I called her love and she replied simply with my name, David. That moment left a strange heaviness in my chest.

I finally found the courage to ask her one evening:
Do you still love me?

She was silent. Didnt look at me. Just said quietly:
I dont know I dont feel the same anymore.

It felt like a dull punch. I asked if something had happened or if there was someone else. She said no, there was nobody elseshe was just exhausted. Tired of feeling lonely despite having company. Tired of talking and not being listened to. Tired of saying I love you and getting nothing meaningful in return.

That night, memories flooded inevery time shed said I love you, and I answered me too without looking up, without a hug, without much notice. Days when I came home glued to my phone. Moments when shed pleaded for us to go out, to do something together, and Id chosen to stay in bed. I always thought love was about providing, keeping us afloat. But she needed words, time, and attention.

Since then, Ive tried to change. I say I love you now, I hug her, I text during the day. I invite her out. But its not the same. She watches me closely, almost like shes afraid to hope again. Sometimes, when I say I love her, she simply replies, thank you. That hurts more than any no.

We live in the same house, sleep in the same bed, but everything feels different. I feel like Im trying to put out a fire when theres hardly anything left to save. I dont know if Im too late, or if Ive already faded from her heart. I only know Id give anything to go back to those days when she said I love you without hesitation.

What would you advise me?

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