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Envy on the Edge

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Yes, this is perfect! Hell never guess hes not looking at his fiancée

Anna stood motionless before the bedroom mirror, studying her reflection with fierce intensity. Slowly, she reached up and tucked a stray lock of hair neatly behind her ear, her touch trembling with anticipation. Her heart racedwhat she saw exceeded even her most hopeful expectations. The meticulous makeup, the carefully styled hair, the studied expressionevery detail had been copied to uncanny perfection. Anna held her breath; with her sisters favourite dress added, she doubted even their own mother could tell them apart at a glance.

The thought curled her lips in a sly smile, but she caught herself, flicking a glance at the mantelpiece clock. The hands marched inexorably closer to the appointed hourjust twenty minutes until Simon arrived. Anna felt her nerves tighten. It had to be flawlessno missteps, no suspicious notes in her voice. If Simon sensed anything was off, her months of careful planning would collapse in a heartbeat. And then her sister would win again, as she always did.

She steadied her hands by clasping them, took a long, steadying breath, and walked to the door. The bell chimed just as she reached the hall. Anna set her face, prepared for the performance of her life, and opened the door. There stood Simon, and in an instant, Anna transformed. Her face blossomed with that elusive, delicate smile, her eyes sparkling with almost ethereal warmth.

Hello, Simon! she said softly, her voice pitched in exactly the gentle tone shed so often observed.

Before he could answer, she rose onto the balls of her feet and gently kissed his cheeknothing more, nothing less. Every gesture was rehearsed, measuredprecisely as shed practiced.

Come in, can I get you a coffee? she offered, standing aside with an easy, caring air, as though this evening were perfectly ordinary, not a carefully choreographed deception.

For a moment, Simons eyes narrowed, searching her face as though trying to unearth the secret beneath it. But then a bemused smile played on his lipshed realised something. Yet it didnt deter him; if anything, his curiosity sharpened. What was Anna playing at, pretending to be Melissa? What could she possibly be after? Deciding to play along, Simon nodded and followed her into the flat.

Meanwhile, Anna busied herself in the kitchen, cheeks aching from the unusual softness she pressed into every smile, every movement. She laid out cups and saucers, pausing to eye the expensive bottle of red shed set aside, waiting patiently on the shelf for just the right moment. She knew well enough: Simon was no drinker, with little head for alcohol, but in friendly company, he might stretch to a glass. That was all she neededa little comfort, a little less vigilance, and then her plan could succeed.

As she fussed over the cafetière, Simon settled at the table, arms folded, curiosity and irony mixing in his gaze. At last, unable to hold his tongue, he spoke.

Anna, whats all this about? he asked, steady, watching. And where, by the way, is Melissa? If this is some kind of joke, it isnt your best.

Anna froze, as if searching her mind for a convincing answer. Her eyes flickered with uncertainty, but she recovered quickly, answering with a taut smile and practiced ease.

How did you guess, if you dont mind my asking? And no, not a joke. More an experiment. Melissa knows nothing at all.

Simon raised a brow, twirling his coffee cup and pondering. Whatever Annas game, he would let her unfold it.

You two are completely different, even for twins, he said, tilting his head. I dont see how anyone mixes you up?

He didnt wait for a replyinstead, he pulled his mobile from his pocket and shot off a quick text to his fiancée, asking where she was. The screens glow briefly lit up his face before it blacked out again.

So whats the real point of this experiment? he repeated, slipping the phone away.

Anna shifted in her chair, eyes falling to her cup of tea. She took a small sip, gathering herself, and spoke with surprising energy.

Were always confused for each other. You say were so different, but even Mum cant tell whos who if we dress alike. Imaginematching dresses, identical hairstyleswere like two peas in a pod.

She paused, her gaze distant as if recalling some uncomfortable memory, then continued.

Sometimes itsunsettling. Especially with people we care about. There have been mix-ups before. Like once, my boyfriend was meant to meet me, but he went over to Melissa instead because she arrived first. Or the time Melissa wanted to confide in your mate, and he thought she was meended up revealing things she would never have wanted to hear.

So why not just change your hair? Simon asked, tipping his head. He well remembered Melissas storieshow Anna refused any change to their looks, clinging to the sameness, leaving Melissa always compromising.

Annas response was swifta little wrinkle of her nose, as if something bitter had crossed her thoughts.

Thats not interesting, she shook her head. We made a promisenot to change how we look until universitys over. Its our silent pact. She grinned, mischievous. It comes in handy sometimes. Even our tutors cant keep track of us!

She let out a gleeful, ringing laugh, proud of their cleverness, their ability to slip through the net.

Mmm, I see, Simon replied, giving her a thoughtful look. At that moment, his phone pinged, and he opened it to a message, reading it over with a nod. Melissa says shes waiting at our usual café. She has no idea Im here, does she?

He looked at Anna, sympathy flickering in his eyes.

Dont worry. I wont breathe a word to her about your experiment. I get that youre only looking out for her. No need for me to make matters worse between you.

Annas body went slack with relief. She nodded, gratitude in her smile.

Thank you, Simon. You really are good.

Right, best get going then, he said, rising. Wouldnt want Melissa to start worrying.

The door clicked softly shut. Suddenly, the silence in Annas flat crashed over her, suffocating in its intensity. She slumped into her seat, gripping the table edge hard to stop her hands shaking. Why hadnt it worked? Why hadnt he fallen for it? Despite all her plotting, shed failed utterlyher plan shattered in seconds.

Her mind reeled, dragging her back to the beginning, when Simon had first entered their lives. From that moment, with his easy grin, calm confidence, and the lightness he brought, shed been utterly and helplessly hooked. Every time he was near, her heart hammered, her palms grew clammy, and she rehearsed what she might say, picturing perfect conversations and laughter, only for her self-doubt to stop her every timefear of rejection, of spoiling the fragile peace with Melissa.

Melissa, always bold, had simply brought Simon round one weekend, as if it were the most ordinary thing. Meet Simon, shed announced breezily, and their parents had glowed at how charming her boyfriend seemed.

Anna remembered it allthe way she lurked in the living room doorway, watching Simon joke with her father, field questions from her mother, light up the whole room. Inside, she boiled with jealousy, but her expression remained a serene, practiced smile. How impossible it was, keeping up the façade when her soul was roaring in protest.

He should have been hersshed spotted him first, shed felt the pull before anyone else. Shed spent nights imagining their walks, their futures. But Melissa had simply swept him up, without a clue that her own sister harboured feelings.

Anna breathed deeply, struggling to steady herself. She knew these thoughts could swallow her whole. She had to pull herself together, to find some course forward. But how, when her heart churned with pain and bitter defeat?

Men gravitated to Melissa. She was sunlightopen, witty, infectious, always at the centre of the party, talking to anyone, yet somehow always excelling at her studies. Anna, by contrast, was introspective, quietly diligent, finding solace in books or hushed evenings, the antithesis of her lively sister.

Had she made the right choice, shunning Melissas invitations, refusing her world of parties and new people? Maybe, if shed tried just once, Simon would have noticed herthe serious, thoughtful one, always in control. But instead, hed fallen for Melissathe unpredictable whirlwind, but maddeningly enchanting.

Deep inside, Anna realised, it wasnt only temperament. Melissa had that rare ability to be the centre of everything without even trying, drawing people in. Anna always worried too much, always second-guessed, always held back, and so she lived in the background.

The thought gnawed at her. She clung to the idea that diligence and reliability would one day win her the respect, the love she longed for. Yet, in the solitude of a quiet evening, she painted other futures in her mind, always wondering how differently things might have turned out.

And then Melissa, radiant one evening at dinner, had announced she was engaged. Anna felt her world collapse. Shed forced herself to smile, to congratulate and even embrace her sister, but all the while inwardly screaming that this couldnt be happening. The rest of the night was a blur of polite laughter and automatic responsesit felt like all the air had been sucked from the house.

After that, Anna barely slept for days, replaying her options, grasping for a solution. At last, shed conceived her desperate plan. If Simon sees me instead, if he falls she reasoned, and then Melissa discovers useverything will fall apart. Let neither of us have him, if I cant. Shed worked out every detailthe bottle of wine Simon would willingly drink, rehearsed her lines, mirrored her sisters gestures, all down to the lighting in the room.

But it had crumbled instantly. Simon had known it wasnt Melissa within moments. Her ruse, so perfectly plotted, failed utterly. Hed politely left to go and meet the real Melissa.

Anna sat in her room, staring at nothing, her masterpiece of a plan now worthless. Time was running out; the wedding loomed. She needed a new strategy, and fastbefore it was too late.

Something more foolproof this time, she muttered, knotting the corner of the tablecloth in her fists. Thoughts whirred, but nothing seemed sure. She knewshe couldnt afford another failure.

************************

A few weeks later, a glowing Melissa brought the family round the dining table, announcing, voice trembling with joy, Im expecting! Her eyes shone, her happiness filling the room as she spoke of the future shed dreamed of. Their parents beamed, questions tumbling out, already planning for this bright new arrival.

Anna sat silent, her hands wrapped tight around a teacup gone cold. She forced a neutral smile, nodding and echoing congratulations, while inside, pain lanced through her like icy daggers. Each phrase, every delighted look exchanged between her sister and their parents, seemed to dig deeper beneath her skin.

She pictured the futurefamily dinners with Simon, holidays with him proudly holding Melissas bump, celebrating every milestone. Annas imagination paraded these scenes before her, each more unbearable than the last. She was not ready for this trial: to see him, time and again, belonging to someone else. It was too much.

Her thoughts turned darker. Something had to be done, and soon, before it was truly too late. And slowly, a terrible plan began to crystallise in her mind. What could wound Simon and Melissa more than the loss of the child they now longed for? It was unfair, it was heartless, but in her desperation, Anna saw no other route.

She caught Melissas eyeso full of hope and trusting affection. For a moment, Anna hesitated, her heart catching. But she suppressed it, her mind already racing through the details. She would need to contact a sympathetic doctor, someone willing, for the right price, to write a prescription. Nothing dangerous, just something that might cause complications

A strange, hollow laugh escaped hera sound almost silent, weighted with grim resolve. Melissa, hearing it, glanced over and smiled back, mistaking her sisters strain for shared excitement.

Your happiness wont last, Anna told herself, eyes glittering with cold resolve. In that moment, she was frighteningly certain of the path she was about to take.

************************

Do you want some juice? Annas voice sounded calm, everydaypracticed, too. She even smiled, her lips fitting the familiar, perfect curve.

Oh, thank you so much! Melissa replied, giving Annas hand an affectionate squeeze. You really are the best sister anyone could have!

Anna froze, a tremor passing through her, but she forced herself to smile.

Ill just get it now, she said, fighting to keep her voice steady.

In the kitchen, she pulled the carton from the fridge, pouring juice into a glass. Her hand drifted to her pocket, feeling for the tiny pill. Closing her fingers around it, she stopped.

What was she about to do? Anna stared at the glass, then at the pill in her palm. Images flashed before her: Melissa gleeful about her pregnancy; their parents, elated; Simon touching Melissas stomach with gentle pride.

Was she truly capable of such a thing? Surely notthis was monstrous.

No! This was madnesssome fever gripping her mind. She couldnt. She wouldnt.

She let the pill fall, tiny and harmless, onto the counter, and drew a shaky breath.

Anna? Is everything all right? Melissas voice came softly from behind. She was in the kitchen doorway, brow creased with concern. Youre awfully paleshall I call someone?

Anna looked up, suddenly seeing not just her sister, but the genuine, uncomplicated love in Melissas eyes; the pure joy at this time in their lives, of these shared, ordinary moments that somehow now meant everything.

No, my head just spun for a second, Anna managed, smiling, struggling to make her voice sound normal. Its nothing. Heres your juice. Ill make some tea for myself and join you in a minute.

Turning to the sink, she set the kettle boiling, trying to ignore the trembling in her hands. Every gesture was an effort; life seemed dense and unreal, as though she waded through a heavy fog.

The storm inside her chest finally brokeshe had come so close to an irreversible step. How easily, she now understood, poisonous thoughts grow when you nurse them, when you give them shelter long enough to fester and drive you to the edge.

Anna poured the kettle, breathing in the familiar scent of English tea, letting the comfort settle her. She turned to see Melissa sipping her juice, chatting about the weekend, happiness illuminating her face. Annas heart clenched with guilt and shame.

How could I? she thought. How could I even consider it? Shes my sister, my closest family.

For the first time, Anna recognised that her conflicted thoughts were not just momentarythey had been growing for years. Resentment, envy, the sense of always missing out, all wound tight in her chest. And now shed nearly let that bitterness destroy everything.

She drew a ragged breath, steadying herself. She needed helpreal help. Someone who could observe, interpret, and guide her through the maze shed lost herself in.

What are you thinking about? Melissa tilted her head, studying Anna with a soft smile. Youre very quiet today.

Oh, its nothing, Anna replied, forcing herself to look brighter. Just work on my mind. I should speak to someone, get organised.

It wasnt the whole truth, but Melissa accepted it, launching into her plans for the weekend. Anna listened, replying now and then, feeling a new resolve build within hernot relief, but determination.

She wouldnt let jealousy control hernot now, not ever again. There was too much at stake: her relationship with Melissa, her own happiness, her very future.

The first step was to admit itto seek help, not shrink from it. To say, honestly, Im lost. Im hurting. I want to be better.

************************

Melissa bore a beautiful baby girl, who instantly became the apple of everyones eye. She arrived on a quiet night in June, and by morning, the new grandparents pressed their faces to the window of the ward, beaming at the bundle she made, with her rosy cheeks and a breathtaking spread of lashes.

Those first days at home were a jumble of tiny miracles. Melissa and Simon rose turn by turn to feed her and change her nappies, learning as they went. Their parents brought armfuls of knitted blankets and plush toys, and their grandmother spent hours clicking away at little booties, while their grandfather boasted to the neighbours about his precious granddaughter.

More than anyone, Anna doted on the child. Since her change of heart, she visited almost dailynominally to help Melissa rest, but soon staying for the joy of watching her niece clutch a finger, scowl in tiny frustration or break into a gummy grin for a familiar face.

Anna grew deft at lifting her, rocking her, humming lullabies she made up on the spot. She dressed her in frilly dressesone week a pink romper with embroidered daisies, the next a blue outfit dotted with teddy bearsand marvelled at each new expression.

Before long, she was more than aunt, she was confidante. Anna set up tea parties with toy china, pored over picture books, helped with her first steps, clapping and laughing with delight when her niece toddled towards a toy unaided.

Melissa observed this bond and was deeply grateful. One night, as Anna collected scattered toys, Melissa hugged her and said quietly:

Thank you. I see how much you love her. It means the world, having you as her aunt.

Anna smiled, slightly abashed but deeply moved. She never expected nurturing her niece would bring so much joy. In these small thingsher giggle, her warmth, her trusting hugAnna found belonging, comfort, and love.

And so, as the months turned, watching her radiant niece, Anna truly understoodsometimes life brings us unexpected gifts. And sometimes, its by caring for others that we find our own peace, our own happiness.

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