My Daughter Nora Keeps Having Babies, and I Feel Sorry for My Grandchildren—Let Me Tell You Why

My son got married at the age of 33. These days, thats rather common, but when I was younger it wouldve seemed quite late. He married when his girlfriend fell pregnant. We were thrilled, as it was our very first grandchild a baby girl. We truly couldnt have been happier. His wife isnt at all a bad person; she keeps a neat home, is young, pleasant, and, to my astonishment, she knows how to knit. That surprised me as I never could manage a needle and yarn myself. All in all, shes a lovely young woman with a decent character, and as long as my son is happy, I have nothing more to wish for.

When our granddaughter turned three, they announced another baby was on the way, and before long, our second grandchild a boy was born. Thats when they began renovating the old house left to us by my mother. We celebrated that as well. Not even three years later, my daughter-in-law shared that she was pregnant for a third time. Then, two years after that, she was expecting again.

I live from one paycheque to the next, relying on my sons help. Hes always managed to make ends meet, especially as he can fix almost anything and takes on construction jobs here and there. He does practically everything himself. Yet, hes just a lorry driver by trade, so I cant help but wonder why he felt a third child was necessary. Hes hardly at home, constantly working extra hours just to get by.

Just before Christmas, my daughter-in-law handed me a shopping list for the children. Was it filled with sweets and toys? Not at all it consisted entirely of essentials: things like baby oil, socks, tights, and all the everyday items you cant find in supermarket promotions.

I asked my son where they planned to have their fourth child. He simply brushed the question aside.

At least I managed to raise a hardworking, responsible son, whos never shied away from an honest days work. His wife, nearly 35, has never held a job and has no employment record. For all I know, shell have a fifth child at forty and I wouldnt even be shocked. But I wont live forever, and eventually Ill grow too old to help. Her own mother has passed away, so without me there is no one to lend a hand. To their credit, they have finally managed to finish renovating the house. Still, with four children under one roof, it never really feels quite enough room.

I asked her, When all this support dries up, what will you do? Where will you look for work at 40, never having worked a day in your life? She simply said shed cope somehow. But what if, heaven forbid, something happens to my son? What would become of them all? How would I ever manage to help raise so many grandchildren alone?

I have another son as well. He often complains that I rarely spend time with his child, as my time and energy are always devoted to my eldest sons family.

In all honesty, Ive realised that while its wonderful to care for your family, sometimes giving too much can leave you stretched thin, with no time left for yourself or others you love. Lifes lesson, perhaps, is that its just as important to let our children stand on their own, so that they may learn to take care of themselves and those they love in turn.