We dreamed my mum would retire, move to the countryside, and leave her three-bedroom flat to me and my husband!

We had pinned all our hopes on the idea that, one day, my mother would retire, head off to the countryside, and leave her three-bedroom flat to me and my husband!

Let me tell you about my neighbour, Barbara. Shes 68 now. Shes always lived alone in her spacious three-bedroom flat in London. Only recently, Barbara decided to let her flat and set off on an adventure.

Her daughter, Harriet, paid me a visit and poured out her troubles:
What is my mother doing? Shes completely let me down! Now, my mother-in-law keeps saying Ill go barmy in my old age, just like my mum. She says the apple doesnt fall far from the tree. Weve only just taken out a loan on a new car, and were already behind on payments for the last two months. We so hoped Mum would help us! But shes vanished, let out the flat, and gone travelling!

I stared at Harriet, quite baffled. Why should her mother be the one paying for their car? But Harriet kept going:
My mother-in-law cant stand that were living with her in her tiny house, and now Mums let her place out to strangers!

I could tell Harriet was after sympathy, but honestly, I believe Barbara has done the right thing. She surely deserves to live as she pleases. Why do people expect that as soon as a woman retires, she must devote herself entirely to her grown-up children and grandchildren? It hardly seems fair! I asked Harriet,

Why not rely on yourself and your husband? Why not put your own efforts in? Youve had fifteen years of marriage why not work towards a home of your own? Then your mother-in-law wouldnt have a leg to stand on, would she?

Harriet replied:
We so hoped that Mum, when she retired, would escape to the Cotswolds, and wed move into her three-bedroom flat!

I couldnt resist teasing Harriet a little:
What if Barbara meets someone special? Her old friend went on a package holiday to Majorca and ended up meeting a gentleman. They married, and now shes living happily in Spain! Perhaps Barbara will follow suit.

At that, Harriet looked at me as though Id sprouted feathers. Only yesterday Id seen photographs Barbara posted online. She wrote that shes having a marvellous time and embracing life. I was thrilled for her. I think shes made the right choice. Theres nothing about age that stands in the way of happiness or gathering fresh, joyful experiences Even if, in this dream, the double-decker buses sprouted wings, and the lampposts whispered secrets about freedom, it all made perfect sense.