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A Father Receives a Secret Coded Message from His Son and Realises He Must Act Without Delay

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Picture this: your teenage son or daughter is out in London with friends for the evening. Naturally, as any caring parent would, you give them a ring to check if theyre alright. Just a bit uneasy, they reassure you that everythings fine. Yet that fine does little to calm your nerves when, later on, you find out they tried alcohol for the first timeor, perhaps, something worse.

A vicar named Richard Green is all too aware of this particular dilemma faced by teenagers, and hes determined to help his youngest son, Oliver, avoid finding himself in such tricky situations. Having grown up as the vicars son himself, Richard knows how intense peer pressure can be. Even though he trusts Oliver, he longs for his son to feel secure enough to turn to him for helpno matter what. So, Richard comes up with a clever idea: a secret code the family can use as a silent S.O.S. Using this code, Oliver doesnt have to worry about losing face in front of his mates, something which is so common at that age.

Richards inspiration strikes after visiting youth support centres around Manchester. He would often ask the teenagers there, How many of you have ever found yourselves doing something you didnt want to dosomething you were nervous about or embarrassed bybut you went along with your friends because you were afraid theyd laugh at you, and you couldnt see a way out?

Without fail, nearly every hand in the room shoots up. Later, Richard writes about the experience:

One day, my youngest, Oliver, was heading off to a party. I told him, if anything feels wrong, if hes uncomfortable or just out of place, he could send an X via text to any of usme, his mum, or his older brother or sister. Whoever receives the code must simply call Olivers phone after a few minutes. When he answers, the conversation would go something like this:

Hello, yes?
Oliver, somethings come up and I need to come and get you right away.
Whats happened?
Ill explain in the car. Be ready in five minutesIll be there.

After that, Oliver just tells his friends somethings happened at home and hes got to leave straight away.

And thats that. He goes. In his friends eyes, he hasnt bottled ithes just had to go because of family business. As a result, the teenager knows his parents got his back, and he feels much less anxious among his group.

The most important thing is never to let your child down when they need help. Its all too easy to lose the trust of a teenager, but building a relationship where your child learns to make the right choice on their own, in favour of whats good, is truly worth its weight in gold.

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