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Our Friends Came to Visit Us in the Village and Were Offended That We Didn’t Serve Them Beef

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Why would anyone want to move? Especially to the countryside. Everyone seems desperate to head for the city, and here we were, doing the exact opposite. What on earth is so appealing out there? I cant understand it, honestly. Its nice enough in the summer, but come winter, theres not a soul about and nothing to get up to.

I had a friend, Alice, who did everything in her power to talk us out of moving to the country. That wound me up, I wont lie, and my wife felt much the same. As if we were out here living our lives by what Alice wanted.

After nearly a year of searching, we finally managed to find just the right house, and off we went. Still, Alice never missed a day to ring me, almost mocking, and ask if Id managed to land a job yet. She knew perfectly well I worked from home and had no intention of changing that. Shed take a dig and ask, Isnt the broadband rubbish out there?

Alice and her husband showed up for a visit at the start of October. Wed been in the new place over a year by then. She wandered round the garden, rather half-heartedly, and spent the rest of those two days parked at the kitchen table knocking back lager with her husband.

Through their entire stay, we just kept on lugging our vegetables down to the cellar and sorting out kilner jars of chutney and preserves. On the third day, Alice and her other half started packing up for an evening coach back to London. We didnt offer anything to take homedidnt even occur to us, to be frank. Then Alice herself asked if wed mind giving her a sack of potatoes and some apples.

I offered to fetch everything from the cellar, but neither of them fancied the steps, both still nursing hangovers. So I handed them a big old sack and a few buckets, and off they went to rummage around under the apple trees. I did wonder how on earth theyd lug it all back on the coach. But as soon as theyd picked the apples, it became apparenttheyd asked my wife in secret to give them a lift.

It was a three-hour round trip to the city and back. My wife cottoned on straight away and pointed out shed already had a pint, so no driving for her. They ended up trundling off, bags in hand, never to be seen visiting again for the next few years, though of course we kept in touch. Somehow, I dont think our little village was quite their cup of tea.

Then, out of nowhere near the end of November, they turned up unannounced at our front door, claiming to want to surprise us. Theyd come for the weekend but honestly, it was a terrible timework had me rushed off my feet getting Christmas orders out. I still had three turkeys to pluck that day. Still, a surprise is a surprise.

I quickly laid out some food, and Alice and her husband tucked in, drinking and eating as we flitted in and out, busy as ever. We did try to rope them in to help, for what it was worth. Would have been easier if either of them had the faintest idea about plucking birds, mind you. Youd think country folk like us would have taught them by now.

All our poultry was spoken for that year, set aside for pre-Christmas deliveries. Wed planned to keep just enough for myself and my folks. Still, not feeling right about it, I offered them a goose, telling them theyd have to pluck it themselves. They said theyd sort it out in the morning.

Next day? Not a word. Well, fine, stay quiet then. This time at least, theyd driven up in their car, and even bought a bird from the farm shop nearby. Before they left, I offered out some veg and a couple of jars of picklestake whatever you fancy. They stuffed their boot full. Didnt bother me; I was glad for them to have it. Weve got plenty to last us for a while yet.

But then Alice floored me by asking, Dont you have any spare beef?

I replied honestlyno, we didnt. We only raised enough for our customers, and with orders to fill, the cattle had to wait until their time. Its not as if were rolling in money; we need to make a living. And if we ever had any excess, it would go to family firstmy sisters and brothers.

I imagine Alice and her husband were a bit put out. She hasnt rung or messaged since, and a mutual friend actually said we were being stingy. Came to the village, left empty-handed, apparentlythats what she told everyone.

Looking back, I realise that no matter where you live or how much you try to help, some people will always see things through their own lens. If theres one thing my time in the countryside has taught me, its this: you can only do right by yourself and the ones you love. The rest is out of your hands.

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