My Father Forbade Me from Taking My Own Daughter, Fearing That I’m Too Soft with His Granddaughter

My dad has strictly forbidden me from picking up my daughter, worrying that Im far too soft with his precious granddaughter. Lately, my little one has taken to crawling, and anytime I leave the room, she wriggles after me, desperate for a cuddle. Granddads advice? Dont spoil herlet her figure things out on her own, parked safely on the carpet. Apparently, if she sits on the floor long enough, shell develop independence, or so he claims. Still, I cant help myself; I scoop her up every time, which makes me wonder if Im being terribly overprotective.

Its trueI am hopelessly gentle with her, always soothing her when she cries, drowning her in kindness, and resisting the urge to scold even when she bites my finger with those surprisingly sharp gums. Perhaps Im overcompensating for the love and care that I missed as a child. My mother passed away when I was very young, and I ended up in a childrens home. I never knew my birth parents. Eventually, my cousins family took me in when they heard what had happened and gave me a new homeone with its own quirks.

At first, life was a little thorny. My dad could be rather aloof, while Mum worked herself to exhaustion to keep us all afloat, leaving scant time for affection. Though I understood they did care for me in their way, neither seemed quite sure how to show it. So, I learned to tell myself bedtime stories about a magical kingdom where I was the beloved princess, showered with praise and adoration, ruling over a court of love and biscuits.

As I grew up, I kept looking for approval and tendernessin friendships and especially in love. I clung to anyone who showed a speck of interest, finding myself stuck for five years in a relationship held together with more denial than actual warmth, terrified that Id never find someone else to care for me. My husband now is a thoughtful man; he knows some of my backstory and supports me when the shadows creep in, but there are chapters Ive never shared. Yet even after everything, I simply cant stop myself from loving my daughter to bits, convinced she deserves every ounce of affection I can mustera world away from the ouch-y sort of childhood I once had.

So yes, perhaps I am too soft, too generous with my cuddles. But, honestly, can you ever really love a child too much? I reckon not, no matter what the granddads sayfloor or no floor.