My Parents Never Had Time for Me—Now I Don’t Want to Make Time for Them!

You know, my parents always lived far away from me. When I was little, they left me in the care of my grandparents because they both had really demanding jobs. It’s not like they were struggling for money or anythingthey just put their careers before spending time with me. Because of that, I grew incredibly close to my grandparents; they were the ones who really supported and encouraged me throughout my childhood.

When I turned eighteen, I inherited two flats, which was my chance to show my parents I was capable of standing on my own feet. I ended up selling the flats and used the money to buy myself a house in the city where I was studying at university. Even during my university years, my parents were hardly around, and eventually, I just got used to having a distant relationship with them.

Sadly, while I was still at university, both my grandparents passed away. Their loss made me feel even more detached from my parentsI realised they hadnt really played a meaningful role in my upbringing or my life in general. Not having any real relationship with them made it difficult for me to want to put time aside for them, just like they didn’t for me when I was younger.

When my parents later told me they were disappointed I hadnt given them any part of the money from selling the flats, I didnt feel any obligation to share it. To my mind, they werent there for me during the times I needed them, so now I felt I had every right to focus on putting my own needs first. Whenever they complained that I never made time for them, I just ignored it because Id learnt to prioritise my own work and wellbeingexactly as they had done when I was a child.

My response to their complaints was simple: Sorry, I dont have time, Im at work. I genuinely felt that, if anyone, they should understand what its like to have your job take over your life, since that was the path they chose all those years ago. Deciding to put myself and my own goals first was how I dealt with them not being present, and I realised it was alright to finally choose my own happiness and fulfilment above everything else.